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I slather butter on my pancake and think about it. “I know that’s how you guys think, but he already feels like he owes you. I know that.” She doesn’t let up. “Fine. He could use a new stocking cap. The one he has is shitty.”
“Mouth,” she scolds, and I shoot her a quick smile.
“That’s all I can think of. He likes what I do. Football. Camping out under the stars, and that’s about it.” I can’t wait for it to get warmer and to stop snowing so maybe we can go on a little camping adventure.
“All right, honey.” She pats my head. “He really is your perfect match.”
Once again, I wonder if my mother knows about us, but I don’t say a word. I don’t ask her, mostly because I know that Zach’s worried about anyone knowing. He thinks it could hurt his chances of getting custody of the girls. And depending on who’s in charge of that, he could be right.
No matter what, I’m going to make damn sure he has everything he wants. He doesn’t need things. He needs security.
My brothers race down the hall and slide into their chairs, followed by Mary and Anna, who seem to be far more civilized. They each take a seat, and Anna looks at me. “Where’s Zach?”
“Camper. He’ll be here soon,” I answer her, and feel the weight of her gaze. She seems a little suspicious sometimes, always watching me with a wary look, but she’s been through a lot, and I can’t really blame her.
Thankfully, Zach comes through the front door a moment later, and I watch Anna seem to fully relax. She’s depended on him for so damn long, I’m sure it’s scary to be living under a different roof from him.
He walks inside, freshly showered and taking his coat off, then leaving it on the hook by the door. His dark-washed jeans hug his body perfectly, along with the dark long-sleeved Henley he’s wearing.
Goddamn, he looks good.
And whether the world knows it or not, he’s all mine. But when he sits down next to me and I finally pry my eyes off my boyfriend, I’m met with my mother’s gaze. She looks pleased, though, as she offers up food to everyone who just joined.
“Hurry up now. You all need to get to school.”
I’m ready to be finished with school, if I’m honest. I mean, education is important and all, but these last few months can’t go by soon enough. I’m not going off to college or moving out of town.
I’m finally doing what I always wanted to do. I’m going to farm this land, build my house, and do it all with Zach at my side.
I can’t wait for it, but I promised my parents I’ll finish high school, and I’m going to do it. Thank God, Christmas break starts soon, and we’ll have some time off.
I listen to Zach question his sisters about this week at school. And once again, I can’t wipe the dopey grin off my face, thinking about all that free time we’ll have during break.
Spending as much time as we can in that little camper.
We haven’t had sex yet—notsex,sex, but we’re getting closer to it, I think. I should probably be nervous, considering up until a couple of months ago I didn’t think there was a sexual bone in my entire body. But now that I’ve had a taste of Zach, I can barely remember that time.
I’m ready to be with him in every single possible way. Nerves or not. I want this with him. I want everything with him.
Because as long as we’re both involved, it’ll be absolutely perfect, and I also know the only time he’s not lost, stuck in his head, is when he’s allowing me to explore his body and bring him pleasure.
A task I am more than happy to do over and over again.
TWENTY-SIX
ZACH
The Bateses do way too much for us. I’m not surprised in the slightest, but still. My sisters were absolutely spoiled this morning by so many gifts under the Christmas tree.
But they weren’t the only ones. I received a stocking hat, and lots of clothes, including coveralls to keep me warm while doing chores. Mr. Bates said it was selfish on their part and was to keep me from whining, but we all know it was all given out of kindness. And there’s nothing selfish about these people.
I also got a new sleeping bag and some cool camping gear. It’s too damn much, but it felt kind of amazing, sitting in the warm living room with hot cocoa surrounded by family opening presents.
Mrs. Bates had loud Christmas music playing, but no one complained. And when Jameson and Garrison showed up, she shoved presents at them both, and we watched them open them up before a huge lunch.
Now we’re walking around the land with Jameson and Garrison, catching up a little. It’s been a while since we’ve seen them, but they both seem happy. Really damn happy. It’s hard to believe there was a time when they used to hate each other.
But those days are long gone. Our shoes crunch over the fresh snow, and it’s cold as hell out here, but there’s still beauty. I’ve never not understood Adam’s fascination with this place—I’ve always thought it was beautiful.
