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“Okay,” she says. “Will you settle me in my bed? I know it’s almost morning, but I’ve been in this chair a long time, and my back is sore.”
We help her to her feet. She leans on me, and I’m struck by a sudden recollection of my mother shortly after the twins were born. When she had sepsis, no one knew. Helping her to the bathroom to be sick for the tenth time that day, not knowing she’d be dead by the following morning.
“My book is on the table there,” she says. Josie picks it up. It’sLes Misérables, a heavy hardback several inches thick.
“I relate to Fantine.” Signora G slips her arm into Josie’s as we meander slowly to the bedroom. “Do you like to read,bella? What is your favorite?”
“I likeThe Little Mermaid,” Josie replies warmly. “I kinda relate to her, too.”
“You mean you fell head-over-heels for a handsome prince and turned your life upside down your life to be with him?” Signora G laughs. “Ah, yes. I was young once, too, you know. But this man of yours will not let you down. He’ll be as smitten with that baby as he is with you, and that’s saying something.”
As we leave, I realize she didn’t call me Rocco once.
42
Sasha
Inever realized how heavy a burden the guilt was. The old lady might be unable to remember everything, but her feelings are as clear as ever, and she bears no ill will. The squeezing grasp of my self-hatred has eased, and I can truly breathe for the first time in years.
It always hurt me to think of my mother, but now, memories of her love flow freely through my mind, holding me up and making me want to fight back.
More than anyone, it’s all for Josie. Ihaveto figure this out.
“We’ll get someone to look after Mrs. G,” I say as we walk to the car. “I’ll call the best home care agency in the city. I’ve offered before, but it was only when you suggested it that she seemed willing to let it happen.”
Josie looks pensive. “I’m worried for her, Sasha. Why had she been in her chair so long anyway? And she looked frightened, too.”
“She often does.” We get into the vehicle. “It must be terrifying to have gaps in your mind. But she’s a tough old lady. She will be fine, and I’ll make sure she wants for nothing when this is all over.”
It’s only a few minutes’ drive to my home, and my heart sinks as we pull up outside. The place is typically full of people. The people I love. Tonight, it’s empty, and if it weren’t for my wife at my side, I’d feel utterly alone. But Josie is here, and I can deal. We may have to play along with Igor’s bullshit for now, but I will find a way through this.
Someone is standing on the steps. It’s still dark enough that they are little more than a silhouette, and I’m terrified it’s Vlad. As much as I desperately wish he was here, it would be bad news if he was.
I wind down the window and the figure approaches. It’s Igor.
“I hear congratulations are in order,” he says, without feeling. His breath is visible in the cold air, making him look like a dragon. “Get out of the fucking car. I want a word.”
Josie starts to speak, but I hold up a hand, silencing her. I don’t know why Igor is here, and I need to keep the situation calm.
“I was about to call you.” I open the door. “Vlad and the rest of the family have left. I told them you and I are taking over, so Vlad thinks I’m the cunt of the century and that I betrayed him. You got what you wanted.”
As I stand, a force hits me like a battering ram in the small of my back, and I’m hurled forward. Igor steps aside, and I fall, my head smashing into the wall. Igor kicks me in the ribs, and I curl up as pain swarms through my chest.
My head is spinning, and I fight to stay conscious. I have a blurry, side-on view of my car, and a man is wrestling with Josie, taping her wrists and ankles. He moves with frightening speed, throwing her onto the back seat when he’s done. It must be him who knocked me down.
I roar with rage and scramble to my feet, but it’s easy enough for Igor to kick them out from under me. My neck is wet, and I realize I’m bleeding from my ear. My head injury could be pretty bad, or it could be superficial, but right now, I’m fucked.
Igor lifts a polished boot into the air, resting the sole carefully on my throat.
“Stay there,” he says.
I dropped my keys somewhere, and I hear the jangle as the other guy finds them on the asphalt. He removes the house key and tosses it at Igor, who catches it easily. Josie’s muffled screams are drowned out by the engine, and just like that, they’re gone.
She’sgone.
Igor bends down so I can see his face. “I sent some men to see Marina a while back. Didn’t she tell you?”
Yes, she did. I always thought it was one of her ramblings.
