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For once, I’m not drowning in stress and I don’t know that I’ve ever felt so content.
It’s been… incredible actually.
I snuggle in closer to Gage and fight the urge to picture us doing this for longer than I know we can. Sometimes I can envision us walking out of this room smiling and together instead of sneaking around. Sharing details about our hopes and dreams instead of holding those things back to protect ourselves from our emotions.
I smile when his hand over mine moves to soothe up and down my forearm. He tilts his head down to kiss my fingertips before sitting up to rub the sleep out of his eyes.
“Last group of cows need brought in today,” he says. His voice is even deeper with more gravel to it in the mornings. I love the little routine we have of telling each other what we’re up to that day. You know, normal fuck buddy stuff.
“My mom is having surgery in…” I reach across the bed to find my phone and check the time, “four hours.”
“Do you want me to drop you off?”
“The hospital is an hour away,” I laugh.
“I know,” he deadpans.
Oh. I couldn’t let him take that much time out of his day just to drive me to the hospital. And that feels very… I don’t know. Serious relationship vibes.
“It’s fine. You don’t need to do that.”
“Maybe I want to.”
His jaw clenches and we stare at each other. This is dangerous territory. I know it. He knows it.
I’m reading too far into this and overthinking it. He’s just trying to be nice, right? It doesn’t mean that he wants to spend time with me outside the confines of this bedroom just because he said hewantedto drop me off.
I want to say yes. I’d willingly be locked inside a vehicle with Gage for a road trip to anywhere in the world. That’s a little tidbit of information I know I should keep to myself though.
“Warren mentioned I could ride with him,” I lie. I’m sure Warren will be happy to have me tag along with him. I just hope he hasn’t left yet and assumed I was already there with Mom and Dad.
His eyes narrow slightly and his lips form a tight line.
“Blythe…” he sighs and takes a few steps toward me.
Might as well nip this in the bud right here and now. I cut him off before he says whatever it was he was about to say.
“I should get going,” I whip around to gather up my clothes and put them on. Before I bail out the door and run upstairs to take a quick shower, I give him a light punch to the shoulder. “See ya when I see ya, buddy.”
I don’t wait for him to respond or to see his reaction, but I can feel his eyes on me as I leave the room. They burn a hole in the surface of my skin, searing straight through.
* * *
“I’m going to grab some coffee, want some?” Warren asks from his spot in the chair across from mine in the family area. It’s nicer than your average waiting room. Plush couches, soft sage walls, and several windows let daylight filter in. And most importantly, incredible WiFi.
“Definitely. Thanks,” I reply.
A doctor has already come to update us once since Mom’s surgery began. She said things are going smoothly and that they should be finishing within the next few hours. Even though I’m excited that this procedure is going to help her in the long run, it’s still nerve-wracking to be waiting on a loved one who’s currently under the knife. No matter how minimal or routine it may seem.
On top of that, the worry of paying for it lingers in the forefront of my mind too. I’ve stalked my bank balance several times already today. Since I’m not enrolled for another semester of school after graduating, my first student loan payment was automatically withdrawn from my account, and it wasn’t pretty.
You could buy two brand-new luxury SUVs for the price that I’ll be paying for the foreseeable future in order to pay for my education. Loans and scholarships were the only option for me though. I didn’t have another choice. My parents would have loved to chip in, but they barely get by on their own as it is.
Which is why I need to figure out how I’m going to get her medical bills taken care of. And fast. These hospitals don’t waste any time sending notices in the mail as soon as the insurance claim goes out.
I could sell my car and ride the bus or carpool to work for the next few years. And skimp on a cheap apartment with roommates and stained carpets. It wouldn’t be so bad. I’m used to a space that isn’t exactly aesthetically pleasing or new. I’d be spending 90% of my time at the hospital anyway.
It doesn’t help that I won’t be raking in as much as I want to for several years and that residents tend to be put through the wringer but paid like they’re part-time dog walkers.
