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This sure as hell qualified as one.
Besides, any idiot can be good with his tongue if he’ll just follow directions.
AND he can’t talk while he does it. Another plus.
“But – I don’t think I can do it again so soon,” he whined. He was talking about a hard-on, the last sighting of which had been half an hour ago.
“That’s why you got to go downtown. Momma needs another big O.”
And not a faked one, I thought, though I wasn’t about to tell Little Miss Fragile Ego that.
Hell, if I got ONE tonight, I’d consider myself lucky.
Might just have to do it myself.
Never expect a tiny-dicked dumbass to do the job of a real man.
Hell, never expect a tiny-dicked dumbass to do the job of a woman’s right hand. Or a vibrator. Or a cucumber. Or anything, basically, besides a tiny-dicked dumbass.
As he started to get to work, I said, “To the left. Slower, dammit. And lick it like you mean it.”
I closed my eyes and thought of Jack.
That’d make it easier, for sure.
155
Jack
Iwas lying in bed with Fiona the next morning, absentmindedly caressing her hair and back as she lay curled up next to me, when I got the call from Sloane.
“I’m putting you on speakerphone so Fiona can hear.”
“I never had me a phone sex threesome before.”
“And you’re not going to.”
“Spoilsport. Alright, Lou’s set the deal for tonight and I got Peters on my side now, ready to screw Lou in the ass on my say-so.”
“How the hell did you get Peters on your leash?”
“Don’t ask what you don’t wanna know.”
Fiona made a face: Ewww.
“Is Little Miss Gettin’ The Good Wood sayin’ somethin’ over there?”
“No,” I lied as Fiona raised one eyebrow.
“I can feel myself bein’ silently judged.”
“Nobody’s judging you, Sloane. You did what had to be done.”
“Damn straight. You may like eatin’ the sausage, girl, but somebody’s gotta make it. There’s a fun little double entendre in there about Jack’s big ol’ kielbasa, but I’ll leave that to your imagination.”
Talking to Sloane was like talking to a sexed-up teenage boy with a love for puns. And it was way too early in the morning for that shit.
I ignored her previous comment. “When’s the meet?”
