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“I’m sorry,” I whisper, my body swaying toward him as if I have no control over myself. “For breaking your heart.”
He blinks once. Twice. His lips part and I wait for him to say something to change all of this.
But I don’t know how it can be changed. What’s done is done.
“I’ve never met someone like you, Daze,” he murmurs, slowly shaking his head. “It didn’t have to be like this.”
“Be like what?” My throat aches and I swallow hard, trying to hold back the sob that lingers there.
“Like you took the best part of me and stomped all over it with your loafers.” He actually smiles, but it’s the saddest smile I think I’ve ever seen. “You own my heart, Daisy Albright. You can kick it, throw it in the trash, do whatever you want to it, but it’s yours. Whether you want it or not.”
FORTY-SEVEN
ARCH
It’s beenover a month since the day Daisy broke up with me over the phone with no real explanation. A month without hearing her laugh or seeing her smile at me. A month without holding her in my arms and kissing her. Touching her naked body and slipping inside of her.
I didn’t get to be with her nearly enough. What Daisy and I shared, it was more than fucking.
And I’ve turned into a complete sap, but only when it comes to her.
I miss her.
I’ve tried to move on. To carry on with my life and pretend she never came into it. I tell myself it wasn’t even that big of a deal. I barely knew her. We spent…what? A couple of months together?
That’s nothing. Just a blip in time. A mistake that should’ve never been made. I pretend that I’m over her and I’m the same carefree jackass who gives in to his impulses and does whatever the hell he wants, whenever he wants to, but those closest to me know the truth.
I’m not the same. I haven’t really returned to my old self. That part of me feels like a stranger I don’t want to reunite with. I’d rather be the guy who felt on top of the world because he had Daisy by his side.
Daisy and her cute ass name and cute face and hot as fuck body. With the braid and the skirt and the loafers and the white lacy socks. The girl whose body belonged to me. I stole every single one of her firsts and I feel like I earned them. They’re mine.
Just like she is. She always will be.
She doesn’t realize it yet.
It’s late October and everything’s shifted. The mornings are crisp and cold and we’ve had a few rainstorms come in. We just finished midterms and I aced everything. I didn’t even have to apply myself—it’s all too fucking easy. I went home over a long weekend and essentially begged my parents to let me leave Lancaster Prep after the fall semester, but they refused.
“Enjoy your time at Lancaster Prep while you can,” Dad said with a sly smile. “You’re only young once.”
“I have expectations once you graduate,” Mother said with a tiny sniff. “Familial obligations that only you can fulfill.”
What the hell my mother was referring to, I have no clue. She probably has me married off to at least three different girls and I could give a shit about any of them. Besides.
The only girl I’m interested in won’t even look in my direction.
We haven’t really talked since that day when I followed her to her house during lunch. When I told her she owned my heart. That wasn’t a lie. She’s still got it, though she probably doesn’t realize it. Hell, she might even believe I’ve moved on. From her viewpoint, I’ve fallen back into my old habits. Hanging out with JJ and the rest of the guys. Cadence and Mya and a few of their friends all sit with us at lunch. Or get together with us after school. We party sometimes together on the weekend, but I haven’t touched anyone.
Not a single girl.
Though they’ve all tried—minus Mya, who’s still messing around with JJ. And especially Cadence. She’s been throwing herself at me whenever she can, and I constantly push her away and tell her no. I’m not interested.
Not at all.
Think she’d get the hint, but I’m starting to believe that Cadence is a glutton for punishment.
After the tension that midterms always brings, we’re all looking for an opportunity to party and the annual Halloween bash is this weekend. We’ve been planning it for weeks, me and all of my friends. Edie and her friends too. If there’s a Lancaster in attendance at the school, then it’s usually up to them to organize the party.
It’s been the distraction I need. If I’m with my friends and my sister putting together an epic blowout then I won’t find myself glancing around in search of Daisy. Though she’s not easy to find. She’s in hiding most of the time nowadays. I’m guessing in the library or in the admin office—which I’m not working at anymore. I got called into Matthews’ office later that day, after I talked to Daisy by her garden, and he told me I had to work in the library with Miss Taylor during second period from now on. She has me shelving books every single day and it fucking sucks.
