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“I’ll go to your party,” I tell her just before I leave the table. I stalk my way out of the dining hall, passing directly behind Daisy’s chair.
Streaking my fingers across her back from shoulder to shoulder as I go.
Don’t need to look back to know she’s watching me leave.
TWENTY-ONE
DAISY
I feelterrible for what I said to Arch. But it’s almost like he needed to hear it too? I don’t know. I probably overstepped my boundaries. I’m guessing no one talks to Arch like that. He’s the privileged eldest son of an esteemed family and in everyone’s eyes, he’s untouchable. Inhuman.
But heishuman. He hurts and bleeds like the rest of us. He also has faults. No one is perfect, least of all him.
I wanted to share with him that I go through struggles when it comes to school, and I ended up talking down to him and calling him out for his faults instead. Probably wasn’t the best approach to take with the only person on this campus who talks to me, but I couldn’t help it.
He needs to realize that to everyone else, he looks like he’s living a perfect life. And if he’s not?
I wish he would tell me. Share his secrets. His hopes and his fears. Though I need to do the same. I’ve barely told him anything.
Yet it feels like he’s got me all figured out.
It killed me to see him sitting with Cadence and her hand on his arm like she owns him. He was kissing me only an hour ago. Devouring my mouth like he was starving and oh God, it woke up all sorts of unfamiliar feelings buried deep inside me. He didn’t even touch me. Just his hungry mouth on mine, kissing me so thoroughly I could barely breathe.
Hot. The man knows how to heat me up and make me want more.
More, more, more.
When he left the dining hall and traced a line across my shoulders, I almost melted with relief. It was a reminder that just because Cadence had her hands on him, he still wanted to put his hands on me.
Or maybe I’m sick and twisted and completely wrong. Why would I be glad a boy let another girl touch him before he touched me? After he kissed me? I should be angry.
Instead, I feel bad.
Sixth period and I can’t pay attention to what Mrs. Nelson is saying, no matter how hard I try. I think about the boy who highlighted his favorite parts in my book. Who was it? Does he know who the book belongs to? I doubt it. If he did, he wouldn’t keep up this conversation with me. No boy is interested in me. Not until Arch.
And he wouldn’t do something like this. This isn’t his style.
I wish I knew who it was.
Courage gathering within me, I grab a piece of paper and start writing. I don’t stop until I get it all out, my every request. I read over what I wrote only once, telling myself I can’t regret it.
I just need to do it.
I wantto know who you are. You might be disappointed in me and maybe you will be when you see it’s me, but I want to meet.
After your class. Right after school. Wait outside of Nelson’s classroom. Please? It’s my birthday tomorrow and…I just want to know who you are.
Maybe we can be friends. I don’t have a lot of friends here and I’m always open to making a new one. Besides, I can’t stand the suspense any longer.
I need to know your name.
I foldthe note and stuff it in the desk, my heart racing wildly. If it’s JJ, I will die. But I know it’s not JJ. The possibilities of who it might be are endless. There are a lot of guys in my class who I’ve never spoken to before. Nice boys who come from good families. Rich boys with impeccable genes and pleasant smiles. Overachievers who might be intimidated by a girl who’s considered smarter than them. A quiet girl who’s too shy to talk to anyone, let alone a boy she doesn’t know.
Inhaling deeply, I hold my breath for only a moment before I let it all out in a shuddery, agitated exhale. Mrs. Nelson catches me, her brows lowering in concern, but I flash her a quick smile, letting her know I’m okay.
Everything’s going to be all right.
I know it is.
