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Her eyes glittered with tears. “Why didn’t you tell me what you did for my daughter?”
My mouth opened and shut. That night at the hospital, I’d given her the facts. What had happened. What condition Gabby was in. What concerns there were and what potential problems we were monitoring for. But I hadn’t mentioned the part where I’d been the one to pull her from the car. Where I’d forced my way onto the hospital staff that night to make sure she got treatment.It wasn’t relevant.
“Oh, I didn’t—”
“You did.” She took my hands in hers. “All week we’ve heard nothing from the other nurses except that Gabby had an angel looking out for her that night.” She squeezed my fingers. “That angel was you.”
Crap.My eyes fluttered, trying to stop my own tears from collecting. “I was just…” I couldn’t finish. It wasn’t my job. It was my code—my oath—but it wasn’t my job. I didn’t work here. I didn’t have to stay and help.
“Well, whatever it was, you saved her life,” Mrs. Nixon continued with a small smile as she squeezed my hand. “She’s all I have, my Gabby. And I hope she grows up to be as strong and fearless as you.”
“Oh, I’m not fearless.” My breath exhaled in a rush.
The other woman’s head tipped. “What other word would you use?”
My jaw went slack, and I scrambled for a response before the call for ‘Mom!’came down the hallway.
Mrs. Nixon turned. “Oh, here she is.” She released my hand and went to her daughter, and I saw the change in Gabby’s expression when her mom told her who I was.
Then I was engulfed in one more hug.
“Thank you,” she murmured.
I let my arms creep around to hug her back. “Of course.”
“Alright, Gabby.” Mrs. Nixon put a hand on her daughter’s shoulder. “I’m sure Dr. Barker has things to do today, and we need to get you home.”
I said goodbye to the two of them, their gratitude steeping potently into my skin.
What other word would you use?
The question nagged at me. I wasn’t fearless. So, what was I?
Afraid.
The word whispered through my veins, sending a chill down my spine. It was uncomfortable. Painful, even. But it was true. My entire life, I’d been afraid. Afraid of being hurt. Afraid of being insufficient. Afraid of being on my own. Alone.
Maybe I had been fearless that night to save Gabby, but I wasn’t fearless enough to save myself.
“Reese!”
I blinked and saw Mom and Dr. Kay headed my way. I went to meet them, burying the interaction I’d had with Gabby and her mom down deep and covering it up with a smile.
“How’s the patient?” I teased.
“Doing better every time I see her.”
“Wonderful.” I smiled and bundled my arms over my chest.
“Reese.” Dr. Kay held me back for a second with a weary smile. “There’s a place for you here. If you want it.”
I inhaled sharply.If I wanted.
If I wanted, there was Decker and a job and mom and…a life.If I was fearless enough to take it.
“Thanks for taking care of my mom,” I told him with a nod.
I walked out of the hospital feeling like I was leaving with an open wound. I didn’t want to think about his offer any more than I wanted to think about Decker’s, but it was getting harder and harder to stop.
