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Memories flood me of my parents abandoning me and barely speaking to me while I was at college. Goldie stepped up and helped me get through it all. Then I moved back to Freedom Valley and tried to reconnect with them, hoping they’d changed, but they haven’t. Deep down, I know that. I can’t forget the times they made me feel so small, so lonely, and repeatedly hurt me. The one person I thought would be my best friend and soulmate left me. At least my parents were here all along. I just had to reach out to them. I had no way to reach out to SJ. No idea how he was or what had happened.
“You don’t know what happened,” he pleads, pain etched across his face.
“You’re right, I don’t know. Because you just left!” I shriek. “No explanation, no note, nothing!”
He looks down, shaking his head. “That’s not true. But I amsosorry, Callie. I can’t go back and change what happened. But I can explain. We can fix this.”
Devastation fills his eyes as he stares at me, and I know he’s sorry. I can feel it. But it can’t erase the twelve years of hurt. Someone who was my whole world just up and left me when we had plans and dreams.
He steps toward me and cages me in against the truck, his arms on either side of me. I think he’s about to kiss me, and my breath hitches. Instead, he leans into me, brushing his nose along mine, and rests his forehead against mine. My lips tremble.
He breathes me in, and his eyes close. My frazzled nerves feel like they finally slow down as he comforts me. He kisses my forehead, and somehow, it feels achingly final to me. Like a goodbye kiss.
He pulls back slowly, eyes still on me. “Give me a chance.”
“A chance for what?” I say, breathless and confused.
“To explain.”
I straighten my shoulders and take a deep breath. “What’s there to explain?”
“There’s a lot to explain,” he practically growls.
“No.” I shake my head.
“No?” he asks and raises a brow.
While I want to hear his explanation, I’m not sure I’m ready. I’m also not sure my heart can handle any more today. He doesn’t get to swoop back into my life whenever he wants and turn everything upside down.
I storm toward the Prius, then stop and turn to look back at him. “No. You had twelve years to explain. You know they say when you meet the love of your life, a part of your heart will always be with them. Well, I’m taking it back, SJ. You no longer get it. I loved yousomuch. But you broke me.”
He shakes his head. “I don’t believe that, and I know you don’t either. You felt that!” He points at me, frustration on his face.
“Consider that your goodbye kiss. The one I never got,” I say, and his eyes narrow.
My heart continues to race as I hurry to the Prius. I won’t be broken again. Not by someone supposed to love me. No one loved me like SJ did. And no one ever will. Not even him.
I used to wonder if SJ would want the thirty-year-old me if he ever saw me again. I don’t have to worry about that. He does. I could see it in his face. And what scares me is that this is not how I thought this reunion would go. This feels out of control. Because SJ didn’t just light up my world. No. He powered the sun. He’s back, and nothing is the same.
four
SJ
Then
I can’t tellyou how lucky I got to have Callie as my best friend, but somehow, I did. Not a lot of people in this town take me seriously or trust me. I’m the son of a single father who is also a local motorcycle club leader in a small town that looks down on him for that. And Callie’s the daughter of a banker and comes from an entirely different world than mine. She loves science. She always has a science dad joke for me, which always makes me laugh, no matter how terrible they are. I noticed some of our classmates had bullied her, and I could never understand why. Callie McGraw is the coolest chick I’ve ever met. She’s just who she is, unapologetically. She loves to color in her anatomy coloring book and has the entire skeletal system memorized. I’ve never met anyone like her. I decided that no one would ever bully her ever again. While some look down on me in this town, no one messes with the biker kid’s son. I’ve made it my mission to show everyone that from now on, if they mess with her, they mess with me. She’s my best friend.
“Hey, knock, knock.” She taps me on the shoulder, pulling me out of my thoughts.
“Who’s there?” I play her game.
“Element.”
I shake my head and snort. “Element, who?”
“Element of surprise, I just discovered a new element!” She laughs like it’s the funniest joke ever.
I shake my head and snort. “Callie, that was terrible.”
