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I don’t want to spell out why I want to stay. Telling my father what we’ve done can’t possibly be a good idea, even with a lack of details. Still, I need him to take me seriously.
“I like him a lot.” Hushing my voice, I’m once more looking around. “I feel safe here—more than I did back at home. We can just ship all my stuff here once the coast is clear and call it a night. Honestly, I bet Idris would let you move in here too if you wanted.”
The guy is too nice for his own good when it comes to the both of us.
Hoping my confession was enough to convince my father, I realized quickly that maybe I should’ve used the word love instead. Feels more impactful. I don’t want him to think my feelings are some kind of crush.
There’s some silence on his end before he decides to drop a freaking bomb on me. Mentions of a fire make my mouth try and my stomach clench. What few bites I did take earlier already threaten to come back up.
“It’s all gone?” I repeat slowly, taking a moment to try and understand what I’m being told. “Everything?”
“Everything. It’ll be alright, Daria. I think I found the perfect neighborhood for us. Somewhere quiet and hardly noticeable. I’ll retire from work and we can try and live a normal life. We can—”
“I don’t want to live a normal life. I want to live with Idris.” My eyes feel wet and I’m acting childish. Well, I’m upset. All my belongings are gone, everything but what I brought with me.
Rather than enjoying the few conversations I can get with the other man, I leave the hall and enter the room where Idris is staring ahead like he’s lost in thought.
His dark eyes meet my glossy ones in a matter of seconds, there’s a purpose to his gaze again. Moving to stand, he’s alert.
“Talk to Idris. I’ll talk to you later.” Forcing out my goodbye to the only family I have left, I set the phone down and sniff back all of these awful feelings. “I’m not hungry anymore.”
Muttering an apology, I twist away and leave the confused man behind as I excuse myself. Wanting to hide away and pretend this conversation never even took place, I go to the room I’m staying in.
Once I get under my blanket, I’m sure I’ll be fine.
* * *
When a knock comes to my door, hours have passed by. With the numbness I’m feeling, I don’t even notice until he knocks again. The sun is no longer up and I’m slow to lift and turn on the lamp on the nightstand.
Idris appears and I feel a little bit better. He looks concerned. Warmth radiates from his body and I just want him to come lay down next to me so I can curl up against his front and feel something that isn’t sorrowful.
Then he ruins that feeling by opening his mouth.
“William told you about the fire.” He says it like a statement, the effect obvious. Of course, the man knew. “I hoped some time would help soothe your pain.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I ask as I draw my knees to my chest. How long had he planned on keeping this information away? Long enough for me to forget I even had a home to go back to?
He sighs as he closes the door behind him. Approaching me carefully, he keeps his distance much to my dismay.
“He asked me not to. He knew you’d be upset.” Looking at my puffy cheeks, he sits at my feet. “William told me that he got a new place. Somewhere even better.”
He grimaces like the information isn’t one to be celebrated.
“Though, he asked me to let you stay for a little longer. I told him it’s up to you, Daria. I don’t want you to force yourself to be somewhere you don’t want to be.”
“Force myself?” I blink back more stupid tears. “You think I don’t want to be here?”
He doesn’t answer quickly enough and I’m left huffing under my breath.
Here I am wanting to be with an older man and I can’t even stop myself from acting like a kid. How could I let myself think that Idris would want me in return?
“Earlier, you looked unhappy. I assumed you wanted to leave.” Idris edges closer, frowning when he sees my tears. Reaching out, he squeezes my knee. “I misunderstood.”
“Understatement of the year,” I mumble as I wipe my eyes. “Do you think I’d just let any guy touch me, let alonelickbetween my legs?”
He frowns more at that. “I’d hope not. I’m fighting myself every time I even think about another man getting even near you.”
My heart likes that, picking up in speed by his words.
