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“Tell me, Caesar. Are you truly happy?” Father tilts his head at me. “Do you find sustenance in your life when it’s being consumed by sex, women, and alcohol?”
“I…” Sucking in a deep breath, I can’t find the strength in me to answer. I wasn’t expecting to reflect on my actions when I hurried in here. Now that I am, the only thing I feel is embarrassment. Shame. Guilt.
“We have our answer. Don’t we?”
My gaze lifts.
“You have a choice,” he says, voice firm despite the frailty of his body. “Either you clean up your act and make a solid attempt at earning the throne, or I will be demoting you from your position. I don’t know what I’ll have you do instead, but I trust that you will make the right decision. Do you understand me?”
“How do I clean up my act? In your eyes?”
“By finding a good woman and marrying her, for starters. That would prove to me that you’re committed to moving past the debauchery that occupies your days.”
It feels like my head is spinning. How am I supposed to give up my current way of living? My position is the one thing that gives me purpose. It’s the reason I get up in the morning, eager to face a new day.
At the same time, it’s also the reason I have such a wide array of lovers to choose from, spanning across the globe.
I’m good at what I do. Not even Alex could take over this position. There’s a reason why Solvaria is held in such high regard in other countries. It’s not all me, but I’m a lot of it.
And if I do follow my father’s orders, what becomes of me? I’ll get married, tied to a woman who will want to settle down. She’ll want kids, vacations, time with the family. That’s not part of my plan right now. I have so much of the world I have yet to see. I have so much more life to live.
Losing your position will leave you empty. You have to consider this. Father isn’t the type to hand out empty threats. He will make good on his promises, no matter how inconvenient they are.
“Are you still with me, Caesar?”
“Yes. Yes, I am,” I whisper, keeping my head low.
Pushing off the bed and rising to my feet, I sigh. He hasn’t given me much of an option, has he?
“I agree to your terms, Father. I’ll work on cleaning up my act and…” My hesitation lingers with me, making it difficult to voice these thoughts aloud. “I’ll find a good woman to marry.”
“Good. Very good. I have faith that you’ll accomplish this, my boy. I wouldn’t be shocked if you surpass even my high expectations of you.” Another alarmingly violent cough rips through my father. Without another word, he waves me off. “Go on, now. I’m tired.”
Bowing my head deeply, I turn on my heels and make my way to the door. His words swirl in my mind, making it difficult to think clearly.
Just like that, my life has shifted dramatically. My autonomy has been taken from me by my father. The man who gave me life is also taking it from me.
He wants the best for me, but why does it feel like the opposite?
“What the hell am I going to do?” I whisper, pinching the bridge of my nose. “I’m screwed either way.”
4
VIVIENNE
Once Caesar leaves to speak with his father, I try to find something to do around the palace. I quickly remember how well-staffed they are, though. Servants swarm all around to ensure the King and Princes have everything they need.
I decide to head back to the hotel, seeking respite.
“Thanks for everything, Aurora,” I tell our de facto hostess. “You managed to bring calm in a storm.”
“Ah, don’t I wish. But thank you. You’re kind for saying that.”
Even the events that end the way they’re supposed to are a lot of work, and this one was far more taxing, for obvious reasons.
“Did you hear?” A murmur fills the hotel lobby when I walk through the large glass doors. It’s not much different from the same tense atmosphere I just left at the palace.
The hotel was built specifically for royal delegates and their aides, so I don’t have any trouble finding what I need. I run a bath, locating chamomile bath salts under the sink, and I take two squares of dark chocolate from the nightstand.
