Page 111 of The Lovely Return


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“Nah,” I say, pouring pink lemonade into our wineglasses. “I think the timing’s perfect.”

“Cherry would want you to love another dog.”

I give a short nod and change the subject. “I tried talking to Lily today.”

She grimaces. “How’d that go?”

“Not well.”

“I think she’s still mad at me, too. She keeps accusing me of taking your side, which I’m not. I don’t like this Jeff guy. She’s been different since she started seeing him. She keeps saying how happy he makes her, but she doesn’t seem happy. We used to stay up and watch movies or talk about our favorite books, but now she doesn’t want to do anything. She just wants to sit in her room by herself and text him. He drives for a living. How the hell is he texting so much?”

Puffing out an aggravated breath, I say, “Good question. I wish she wasn’t so hung up on him. Talking to her went in one ear and right out the other.”

“I feel like I really have no room to talk,” she says. “I’m keeping secrets from her, too. But I don’t understand why she’s being so closed and distant just because she’s all into Jeff. Even though I’m totally crazy about you, I still want to spend time with her, and get out of the house and have fun. Unlike her, I’m not hiding in my room pretending the rest of the world doesn’t exist. I’m not letting my situation with you, as unconventional as it is, negatively impact my life.”

I stare at her, assessing if that's really true. I’d hate it if our feelings for each other were causing her anguish at a time in her life when she should be the happiest.

She cocks her head at me as she sips her lemonade. “Alex, I know what you’re thinking. Don’t worry. I’m happy.”

“Are you, though? You should be dating, going out, seeing the world.”

“If I wanted to date someone, I would. I decided all on my own that the only relationship I want to explore is one with you. And even though it’s not everything we wish it could be right now, I’m happy. I love every moment with you. I love living here with you and Lily. I love my job. I love this little town. I love my drawings and my poetry. I love me and all the choices I’m making.”

I wonder how I managed to attract not one but two incredibly confident women in my life.

“I’m just not digging the secrets and lies. I don’t want any of us living like this.”

A flicker of fear darkens her eyes, which were shining bright as stars just a moment ago. “Do you want to stop spending time with me? If you’re not happy—”

“No. You make me happier than I ever thought I could be.”

Her nose scrunches. “I think we should enjoy our picnic and not worry about anyone or anything else for the rest of the day. Things have a way of working themselves out. We just have to believe that what’s meant to be will be. And we have to focus on this adorable little chunk of fur.” The puppy looks up at us and yawns. “He’s a new beginning.”

“I’m impressed he’s sitting here so good and hasn’t taken a dive into our food,” I say.

“Was Cherry this calm as a puppy?”

I try to think back. It was so long ago, and bad memories have a way of taking over all our good ones. But I find those memories. They slowly uncurl like pages of an old photo album.

“She was. She loved to just be with us. She’d follow me to the barn every morning, then follow me back to the house. Every night, she’d sit on the couch with Brianna, with her head on her lap. Chasing the ball was her favorite thing. She’d chase it and bring it back all day long if we let her. Me and Bri would sit in the grass and laugh while Cherry would run back and forth with the ball in her mouth, doing this little happy trot she did. When we talked to her, she’d look right at us, and I swear she understood everything we were saying.” I run my hand down the puppy’s back. “I noticed right away this little guy has that same soulful expression she had.”

“It’s so cool you noticed that. That’s why we picked him. We saw it, too.”

“He’s perfect.”

When I pick him up and cradle him against my chest, he climbs up and nuzzles into my neck and under my hair.

Penny breaks out into a huge smile. “You look so cute holding him. I can’t handle it.” She pulls out her phone and takes a bunch of pictures. “Did you ever want another baby?” she suddenly asks.

The question throws me off guard. “Honestly, I never thought about it again after I lost Lily. I stopped thinking about the future, babies included.”

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