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“You should leave.”
“Nope. That’s the last thing I should do. See, I thought maybe you needed time. That you only needed soft and gentle. And you do need that. But you also need someone to be stern with you, too. Who won’t let you get away with shit. I’m a new age kind of guy, so I can admit when I’m wrong.”
She gaped up at him.
A new age kind of guy? Was he kidding her? He had to be joking.
“Are you trying to make me laugh?”
A soft look came over his face. “I would love nothing more than to see you laugh.”
Christ.
Why? Why couldn’t he have done any of this before? With old-Hannah? She would have lapped it up like someone who was starved being led to a buffet.
And now she knew she had to send him away—for his sake and hers.
Because hope is a terrible thing. It leads you to do stupid things.
And she couldn’t let herself believe that she could have him. It would be far too painful when he left.
“But I’m not joking. And from now on, I will give you what you need.”
“What does that mean?” she asked, concern filling her.
Because she could kind of guess what it meant.
“It means that as your guardian, your health, well-being, safety, and happiness is all my concern. So it’s up to me to ensure that you’re well looked after. Beginning with taking you to get checked out so we can find out why you fainted today.”
“But I already know.”
Don’t tell him.
“Yeah? So tell me.”
“It’s none of your business since you aren’t my guardian.”
“I declared it with Jake and Duncan.”
“You forget that I’ve lived in this town for years. I know that’s not all it takes. I get a say.”
“Unless the sheriff is seriously worried about your health and safety. Enough to do a welfare check. Then he can ask someone to watch over you until he’s satisfied you’re well.”
“That’s never done.” Not that she knew of, anyway.
“Baby, you fainted. You’ve tried to shut everyone out, push them away. I don’t know why you think you have to face whatever demons you have alone when the whole fucking town wants to grab their pitchforks and rifles and fight them for you. You have more people in your corner than you can possibly know, Hannah. But even more importantly, you have me.”
“Oh, that’s more important?” she asked faintly. Lord, he had a big ego.
But she couldn’t say that it was unattractive.
“Yep, because I will do whatever is necessary to make you laugh again, fight those demons back, and get back the Hannah we used to know.”
“She’s gone, Raid. She’s never coming back. And if you think you can bring her back, then you’re going to be disappointed.”
“Then a new Hannah. One who doesn’t push people away. One who knows her own self-worth. One who has a reason to smile.”
She shook her head, tears filling her eyes until he became blurry.
“I don’t think that’s possible.”
“No crying,” he ordered. “And yeah, it is. If you accept some fucking help.”
“You can’t just order me not to cry,” she informed him as tears dripped down her cheeks.
“Sure, I can. Do. Not. Cry. Do as you’re told.”
“Do as I’m told?” she asked, feeling those tears start to dry.
“Sure, that’s the way this works, right? I tell you what to do, you do it.”
“The way what works?”
“This guardianship stuff. And the fact that you’re a sub.”
Her temper stirred. “Just because I’m a sub does not mean you get to tell me what to do all the time. That’s not the way it works.”
“It’s not?” he asked.
“No. That sort of thing requires consent and going through limits. And not all subs are the same, you know.”
“They’re not?”
“No. Some subs might want a 24/7 power exchange, while others might like to submit only when they play. Or for pleasure. We all have different needs and desires. So you can’t just boss me around and expect I’ll obey you.”
“Well, I wasn’t expecting you to always obey me.”
She stared up at him suspiciously.
“Figured sometimes you might disobey me and then I’d get to spank you.”
“I was never a brat,” she said. “I liked doing what people wanted because I liked to please. I cared about other people’s feelings and desires, and I liked meeting them. It made me feel needed.”
Crap. What was she doing?
She tried to get off his lap, but he held her against him.
“Keep going,” he ordered quietly.
She shook her head. She’d already said too much. Revealed more than she should have.
“You said ‘was’, baby. Do you not still have those same needs? Wants?”
“No.”
“You’re sure?”
“I’m sure.” Because that’s what had got her into this trouble. She’d been stupid and naive and a pushover. So now all she wanted out of life was to be left alone.
“You need to leave,” she told him.
