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"Even if that's true," she says. "That doesn't mean that I'm automatically worthy of being helped."
I look at her in disbelief.
"Everyone is worthy of being helped."
"I'm not so sure that's true," she replies.
"Well, it doesn't matter," I say. "What matters is thatyou'reworthy of being helped."
She opens her mouth to protest.
"Stop arguing," I say immediately before she can get another word out. "You're never going to convince me otherwise."
She curls onto her side and I can feel the bed shake a little with her sobs. They're silent, but they still wrack her body.
"Hey, hey," I say, curling my body around hers. I stroke her hair and wipe the tears away as they fall. "It's going to be okay," I say to her. "You're safe now."
She turns back around and looks into my eyes. She starts doing that thing again where she looks at me like she really understands me and it makes me want to kiss her all over again.
"You've had a long day," I say instead. "You should get some sleep."
"What if I don't want to sleep?" she asks.
She turns all the way around now and her hand presses against my chest. It starts to meander its way lower and lower until finally there's no hiding the fact that I'm hard for her because her delicate fingers are wrapped around my cock.
She starts to stroke me and my eyes close involuntarily at how good it feels. I know if I let her continue I'm going to come and fast. I also know that letting her do this right now would probably be one of the shittier things I've ever done in my life and I really, really should make her stop.
Just one more stroke.
Okay, two.
Three?
"Fuck," I say, reaching down for her hand and stopping her right before I blow my load all over the sheets.
"Am I doing it wrong?" she asks, her anxiety dripping from her words.
I'm breathing heavily, trying to clear the near-orgasm induced fog I'm in.
"No, no, it's not that, sweets," I say to her. "I just think we'll regret it."
I open my eyes and look at her. Another tear travels across her cheek and I brush it away.
"It's not you, I promise. It would just be a really shitty thing for me to take advantage of you in such a vulnerable moment."
"I was the one taking the advantage," she whispers.
I think about it for a second.
"That is true," I reason. "But, I'm not sure everyone else would see it that way."
"Are you going to tell everyone else?" She looks panicked.
"Oh, no. No!" I say, realizing I am completely botching this whole conversation. "Your secret is safe," I say. "All of your secrets."
"Okay."
We're quiet for a few minutes and I almost manage to drift off to sleep, but she says something muffled against my chest.
