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His words echo in my head as I race through the dimly-lit hallways, the pounding of my heart drowning out the sound of my footsteps. My mind races with thoughts of how I'll make things right with Raven, how I'll protect her from any further harm.
As I approach the heavy door leading to the dungeon, I take a deep breath, steeling myself for what lies ahead. The cold metal handle sends a shiver down my spine, and I know that once I step inside, there's no turning back.
"Raven," I whisper to myself, determination burning within me like a flame. "I'm so sorry."
ChapterThirty-Nine
I race down to the dungeon, my heart pounding in my chest like a jackhammer. The dimly lit staircase is steep and narrow, with each step cold and unforgiving beneath my feet. I nearly slip on the damp stone, catching myself just in time. As I descend further, the air grows colder, heavier, filling with the oppressive stench of decay and despair. I can't help but think about how I listened to Carmine and Enzo, their poisonous words slithering through my mind. I should've trusted my gut, dammit.
"Will she ever forgive me for what I put her through?" I wonder aloud, my voice barely audible over the sound of my frantic footsteps. "Does she still love me after all this shit?" I wouldn't blame her if she didn't. But God, I hope she does. I love her more than anything, and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I know that deep in my heart, even though Marco's death fucked me up and I let Enzo and Carmine manipulate me.
Finally reaching the bottom, I see her lying there, asleep on that flimsy excuse for a cot. Tears sting my eyes, and I hate myself—genuinely fucking hate myself—for what I've done. Even if I believed she was guilty of what they accused her of, I never should have let them take her, especially not down here to another goddamn cage.
"Fuck," I mutter, throwing open the door and grabbing the key from its hook on the wall. I rush over to her, my hands shaking as I unshackle her from the wall cuff. When it finally clicks open, I wrap her in my arms, holding her close.
Her body feels so frail and cold in my arms, like a porcelain doll that could shatter at any moment. I can't believe I've done this to her, reduced her to this fragile state because of my own goddamn stupidity. The guilt weighs heavy on my chest, suffocating me as I gently lift her up and carry her out of this hellhole.
"Raven, I'm so sorry," I choke out between ragged breaths, my tears falling onto her face. She stirs slightly, her eyes fluttering open as she wakes. Her gaze meets mine, and the pain and sadness swimming in those beautiful hazel eyes tear me apart inside. I want to beg her forgiveness a thousand times over, but I know it'll never be enough.
"Teddy," she whispers, her voice barely audible, hoarse from disuse. "It's okay."
I shake my head, unable to accept what she's saying. How can she even look at me after what I've put her through? As I bring her back upstairs to her rooms, I try to apologize again, but she stays quiet the entire time. It's killing me, not knowing what she's thinking or if she'll ever forgive me.
"Please, just say something," I plead, desperate to hear her voice. She looks at me for a long moment, her expression unreadable, before placing a hand on my arm.
"Teddy, it's just...it's been a lot," she says softly, her touch gentle despite everything that's happened. "I know you're sorry, and I already forgave you."
The relief I feel at her words consumes me, and I can't help but pull her into a tight embrace. "Raven, I love you so much," I tell her, my voice shaking with emotion. I swallow hard, trying to find the courage to say what I've been thinking for a long time. "Marry me. You've always been the only girl for me, and I've never wanted anyone else."
Her smile is gentle as she takes my face in her hands, her touch warm and tender. My heart swells, thinking that this might actually be the beginning of our future together. But then she speaks, and her words shatter my hopes like fragile glass.
"Teddy, I love you too," she says softly, her eyes filled with affection. "But you misunderstand my forgiveness. I do forgive you, but I can't marry you."
I blink, trying to process what she's saying, but it's like my brain has stopped working. She can't marry me? Why not? I need her in my life, now more than ever.
"Wh-what do you mean?" I stammer, feeling my chest tighten with pain.
"Teddy," she sighs, looking away for a moment before meeting my gaze again. "This experience has shown me that I can't stay here. I've decided to return to the convent and take my vows."
Her words hit me like a sucker punch, leaving me breathless and reeling. The thought of losing her to the convent, of never being able to hold her or kiss her or just talk to her again...it's unbearable.
"Please, stay with me," I beg her, gripping her hands in mine as if letting go would mean losing her forever. "I'll do anything to make it up to you. I swear, I'll never let anything like this happen to you again."
Desperation seeps into my voice, and I can't help but feel pathetic. How did I let Enzo and Carmine manipulate me like that? And it's not even entirely their fault – I should've trusted my gut, known that something was off. But instead, I got caught up in the whirlwind of Marco's death and their poisonous words.
"It's no excuse," I mutter, staring down at our entwined fingers. "I should've been there for you when you needed me most."
She gives my hands a gentle squeeze, her touch warm and tender despite everything she's been through. "Teddy, you don't need to keep apologizing," she says softly. "I understand why you did it. I love you. There's nothing you can do to make it up to me, because I already forgive you."
Her words bring both comfort and pain – comfort in knowing she loves me and forgives me, but pain in realizing that it isn't enough to keep her here, with me. My heart twists in my chest as she continues.
"However, I can't stay here, and I can't be with you," she admits, her eyes brimming with tears. "I need you to drive me to the convent."
"Right now?" I ask, my voice barely above a whisper. The thought of losing her so soon is unbearable, but I know I can't force her to stay.
"Yes," she answers resolutely, and I see the determination in her gaze, the conviction that this is what she needs to do. And as much as it kills me inside, I know I have to respect her decision.
"Alright," I choke out, forcing a smile for her sake. "Let's go."
