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His eyes go distant for a moment, and he frowns slightly, lost in thought. “It was like there was a fog over my mind, and it hid all the logical parts of my mind, leaving only my base instincts which were calling me to you. I trust you, so if you told me that you had to leave and you’d be safe, I wouldn’t have liked it and might have argued with you, but that wasn’t an option. Straight away, my instincts were screaming that you were in danger, that they were trying to take you away from me.” He shakes his head, his vision clears, and his expression softens as his eyes fall on me.
“I think if we weren’t mated, then I would have gone feral. I could feel it,” he continues, voice quiet. “When I found you, it felt like the goddess had brought us back together, only for me to be captured. Then I woke up here and found that we were separated once again, and I thought for sure I was going to lose myself completely. Then I heard your voice.” Smiling, he looks at me with an awe I’m not used to seeing from Syn. “It’s like you called to me. Not the physical me, but what’s in here.” He taps his chest and shakes his head as he tries to explain what he means. “I don’t know if it was my soul or the bond, but you reached out to me and pulled me back.” Pausing, he laughs lightly. “You saved me, Laelia. I will forever be indebted to you for that.” He’s completely sincere, and I wonder just what I did to be blessed with Syn as one of my mates.
My chest feels tight as I listen to him, my heart breaking as I hear what he’s been through. None of this would have happened to him if not for me, yet he’s talking like I’m the sunlight that lit up his world, calling him from the shadows. I knew he was close to losing himself, but to actually hear it aloud is painful.
“You don’t owe me gratitude. This only happened because of me in the first place, Syn. If anything, I should be apologising to you.”
His eyebrows rise as I speak, and I know he wants to argue with me. “That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard, but I can see I’m not going to change your mind.” Sighing, he takes my hand and leads me to the back of the cell where the mattress lies on the ground. Climbing onto it, he tugs my hand so I follow, settling me between his legs and wrapping his arms around me from behind. “In that case,” he starts, stretching out the last word. “You owe it to me, and I’m sure I can think of something you can do to make it up to me.”
Lifting my head to give him an exasperated look, I take in his grin, his wicked smile warming my heart. This is the Syn I know and love. Unable to hold it back, I chuckle and twist around in his arms so I’m kneeling between his legs. I’m pretty sure he’s only joking, attempting to lighten the mood, but my arousal has been building since the moment my eyes locked on him. I slide my hands underneath his shirt, running my fingers over the ridges of his abs, and smile as I wait for his reaction. He groans, and I have to remind myself that he’s still fighting against this fog that he said took over his mind. That should concern me, and sure, I’m going to be cautious, but the thought that my touch awakens his inner animal only serves to turn me on. Moisture pools between my legs, and I see his pupils dilate as he scents it, taking a long, deep breath.
Lowering my hands to his waistband, I quickly undo his pants and slide my hands into his underwear, freeing his hard cock. I wrap my fingers around it and give it a few strokes before flicking my eyes up to Syn’s face. He looks like he’s in pain, his teeth gritted and neck corded, but I know he’s not, I can feel his pleasure. A long, hissing breath comes through his teeth, and his hands now grip onto the mattress tightly. Glancing down, I see his claws push against the skin between his knuckles and know how close he is to a partial shift.
“Laelia…” Breathless from lust and holding back his wolf, he trails off into a growl. “This isn’t a good idea. It’s too soon.”
If I knew that he truly didn’t want this, then I’d stop without question. However, I can feel his need and how much he desires me right now. It’s just his fear of hurting me holding him back. He was close to losing control completely, so he’s totally justified in his concerns, but my instincts are telling me that this is going to help ground him further, reinforcing our connection in the most intimate way.
I remove my hand from his cock, and a mixture of relief and regret flashes across his face as he thinks I’m backing down. My alpha would never back down from me if I needed him, so I’m not about to do that to him. Resting my hands on his shoulders, I lean forward and press a kiss to his lips, enjoying his hum of pleasure as he returns it. Pulling back just enough so I can look into his eyes, I scan his familiar features, committing everything to memory.
“You said you needed to hear me, to have that contact to come back to me, right?” I wait for his slow, almost reluctant nod. “Then us reinforcing the bond is only going to help that.” He doesn’t look convinced, even though I can feel his rock-hard cock pressing against my stomach. It’s not that he doesn’t believe me, he’ll be able to feel the truth of what I’m saying in his bond, but it’s difficult for him to see past his fears. After everything he’s been through, especially with losing his pack after he made a mistake so many years ago, it’s easy to understand why he’d be anxious about trusting his instincts.
Understanding the root cause of his hesitation, I change tactics. Reaching up, I brush his cheek with the back of my hand, lowering my voice and hoping he can feel the sincerity of my words. “Syn, I trust you. You’re not going to hurt me.”
Staring at me like he just won the lottery, he shakes his head, dropping his gaze. At first I think he’s rejecting the idea, but I soon see that’s not the case. Taking a deep breath, he raises his eyes to mine, and I’m blown away by the strength of the feelings I see there.
“I love you,” he whispers, sealing his words with a kiss as his hands work on the buttons at my back, helping me remove my stupid dress and letting it fall to the floor in a puddle of fabric.
Those three simple words make it feel like my heart is too big for my chest, and warmth spreads through me as I deepen the kiss. Now that we’ve decided this is what we’re going to do, those kisses soon turn frantic as our hands quickly roam each other’s bodies.
In a move so quick I don’t see it coming, he spins me around and bends me forward so I’m on my hands and knees before him. Biting down on my lip to stop my groan, I feel the brush of his fingers over my ass cheeks before he hooks them in the elastic of my underwear. There is a tearing sound, followed by the cold touch of the air against my most intimate place, as he rips my underwear from my body with a single touch. Gasping, I grip onto the mattress below me and my legs clench together tightly as my arousal gathers between my legs.
He emits a low warning growl, his hands sliding between them and spreading my legs apart. He stares at my glistening pussy, taking a deep inhale and humming in pleasure. Had I not grown up with werewolves, I would have been mortified at this, since I wouldn’t have known this is an intimate act between mates and lovers, the scent of the other’s arousal the ultimate turn-on. The warmth of his palm settles over my pussy as he cups it, his fingers seeking my arousal and using it to circle my clit. Before I know it, two fingers are pushed into me, and my eyes roll into the back of my head.
I feel him shift behind me as he removes his fingers, and I’m about to whine at the loss of contact when I feel the head of his cock against my entrance. Wrapping an arm over my shoulder and around the front of my neck, he pulls me upright. If he wasn’t holding onto me, I would have fallen back down, still bent forward with his dick against me. He brushes his lips against my neck, nipping and kissing along its length.
“Laelia,” he murmurs against my skin. “Mine.”
“Yes, yours.” My words end on a gasp as he chooses that exact moment to stick his cock into me and bite down on the flesh between my shoulder and neck. There’s a brief flash of pain, but it’s over within a second, pleasure and warmth filling me. He holds onto me with his teeth on my neck, keeping me in place as he fucks me from behind. There’s been next to no foreplay, and I’ll probably be a little sore in the morning, but I don’t care. The feeling of being stretched and filled by one of my mates is the best feeling in the world.
Being in this position, with him pounding into me from behind, is the ultimate show of trust. It’s a vulnerable position to be in, but it also takes us back to our roots, our wolf instincts driving us. It’s primal and raw, and exactly what we both need.
The logical part of my mind is fully aware of the fact that Atlas is out in the corridor watching us, but I don’t feel the same animosity from him that I usually do, so I’m not worried about the repercussions of this. Besides, the logical part of my mind isn’t in control right now.
It’s not long before I reach the edge, and an orgasm rips through me. Syn is only moments behind me, roaring his pleasure as he pounds into me. Once we’re both spent and the aftershocks have passed, he releases me gently and pulls out, gathering me in his arms and settling down on the mattress.
“Did I hurt you?” he asks quietly after several minutes of silence.
“No,” I tell him honestly, knowing he can feel the truth of my words through the bond. “It was what we both needed.”
He’s quiet as he digests my words, running his hands slowly up and down the length of my arms, the movement making me sleepy. He must feel it, because he chuckles quietly. “Rest, Laelia. I’ve got you.”
That’s all I need, and as I start to drift off, for the first time in a while, I truly feel safe.
* * *
As I leave the prison several hours later, Atlas leading the way, I lazily follow behind him, not bothering to try and keep up. I’m exhausted. It’s been a long, stressful day, and I’m sure tomorrow will be no better. Seeing Syn more like his usual self and reconnecting with him was the height of my day, but having to leave him in the cell so I could return to my room has put a damper on things.
While the madness has been pushed back, it’s not completely gone, and I know it will take a while until he’s fully back to being my Syn. I could see him fighting against it as I woke him to say I was leaving. Atlas wanted me to just leave him sleeping and not disturb him, but I knew when he woke and found that I wasn’t there, it would only distress him. Syn hadn’t taken the news well, but at least he didn’t wolf out.
