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Letting my hand go, I stare after him as he steps over to a dresser, opens the top drawer, and pulls out a gray shirt. Next, he opens the middle drawer only to grab a pair of sweatpants. Turning toward me, Kevlar holds the clothes out. “Here you go, Rosie, the pants are gonna be big, but they’ll do for right now. Later, you can go through your boxes and find something else if you want.”
I take the clothes, nodding. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Kevlar be this nice. Not to anyone. Unless you’re one of the kids who were always around the clubhouse.
Kevlar points to the bathroom and shows me where the towels are. “Take your time, Tigress,” he whispers and closes the door, leaving me alone in the bathroom.
Briefly, I stare at the closed door before sighing heavily. This is real. It has to be.
Shaking my head, despair overwhelming me. I set the clothes on the counter, start the shower, and strip out of the clothes I’d worn to the fight tonight. Stepping under the spray, a shiver rushes down my spine as the warm water hits my body. I glance down and stare at the drain as the water washes away the blood.
I suck in a breath only to allow a sob to escape my lips. Tears stream down my cheeks, and I crumple to the bottom of the shower. Everything I’ve done, that I’ve had to do, sinks in.
Wrapping my arms around my legs, I cry, replaying the months of training, the fights I had to fight, what I had to do to win, to live. Oh God, I hate myself for what I had to do. Unable to handle it, I bring my hands up, brush my fingers through my wet hair, tangling them in the strands, and scream as the pain consumes me. I don’t know how to deal with this. To know I took lives doing a sport I used to love.
Why is this even happening to me? Dominic told me that first night I won a fight I was chosen because I was good. I was a winner and would do what it takes to win every match. He knew it because he studied me that they all knew what I could do.
Crying out, sobbing, I try to shake the thoughts away, but they won’t leave. I can’t stop thinking about it.
Hands wrap around my fingers, stopping me from yanking only to bring them around my body. Those hands were attached to arms that surround me. “I’ve got you, Rosemary. Let it out, baby. You can get through this, Tigress.”Kevlar’s soothing voice cuts through the anguish, and I curl deeper into him. “Swear, I’m going to make things right for you,” he murmurs and keeps talking, sweet words soothing. His arms hold me, keeping me grounded instead of free falling.
I don’t know how long we sat there, me crying in his arms, but eventually, he moved, standing, bringing me with him. Without a word, he grabs a washcloth, puts some of the soap on it, and starts washing me, cleaning every inch.
I should probably be embarrassed by this, but I’m not. Instead, I know he’s still wearing jeans and a tee. Something inside me tightened further. He heard me and came to me, not worrying that he was still dressed.
“You’re soaked,” I croak, speaking for the first time.
“Doesn’t matter.” He shrugs, drops the washcloth, and picks up the bottle of shampoo. I stare at him as he washes my hair, massaging the shampoo on my scalp. It feels amazing.
Far too soon, he’s shutting the water off and reaching out of the shower to grab a towel. He wraps it around me. “Do me a favor, baby, grab another towel for me.”
Nodding, I get out, reach under the sink, and grab one of the towels for him. Turning back to give it to him, I find him stripping out of the sopping wet clothes. He’d already removed the shirt and was working on dropping his jeans.
Seeing him naked isn’t a hardship. Kevlar’s body is as impressive, if not more so, than it was the night I got to know it very well.
I hand him the towel as he steps out, takes it, and wraps it around his waist.
“Thank you,” I find myself whispering.
“No need to thank me, Rosemary.” He grunts and moves in close, takes my hands, and brushes his fingers over my busted knuckles. “Get dressed, Tigress, so we can bandage your hands.”
“You don’t have to do that.” I was used to them being like this. It’s not like anyone was around to fix me up. The most I got was a few bandages to use to take care of myself and that was so I wouldn’t get an infection.
“Know I don’t have to, doesn’t mean I’m not doing it. So, get dressed, we’ll bandage your hands, and then I’ll take you to the kitchen and get you something to eat. I’m sure your dad and brother want to see you along with everyone else,” he says.
“I’m . . .” I clear my throat and drop my gaze. “I don’t want to be around a lot of people right now,” I admit.
I haven’t been around people much in months. The only time I was, it was at fights, and I don’t think I can handle a lot of folks surrounding me right now.
“I get that, baby,” Kevlar mutters, nodding. “How about just four for now?”
“Four?”
“Yeah, me, your dad, your brother, and Jade.”
“With Jade comes Viper,” I inform him. When it comes to my best friend, her man is always close by. I’ve always found it cute, if not slightly annoying, but I get what he’s doing it for.
“True,” he grunts, “so a total of five people, can you handle that?”
“I guess I don’t have a choice,” I mumble and grab the shirt off the counter. Without a bra to put on, I drop the towel and pull the shirt on, aware he’s watching my every move. I didn’t get privacy for months, and though he tried, he’s still here. And I don’t know what it is about him, but he makes me feel safe.
