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I can't breathe.
"My mind knows you’re dead," I whisper. "But here I sit waiting for you to walk into this room. How fucked up is that?” I laugh bitterly. I lay my head back against the wall and sob uncontrollably.
I gently bang my head against the wall.
"God. I’m not okay. I’m so tired from trying to be strong. Take me with you, Seth,"I plead in a whisper, shutting my eyes, hoping this is all a dream."I can't do this alone."
Time seemed to have stood still as I sat in the same position without moving. Every muscle in my body had tensed up, turning me into a lifeless statue. The moment I opened my eyes, a sense of hopelessness descended upon me, making me feel like I was caught in a never-ending abyss of helplessness.
The room felt smaller, the air thicker, and the silence deafening. It was as if the walls were closing in on me, and I was trapped in an endless void without escape.
I grab the razor that sits beside me, taunting me.I've never thought about ending my life until my other half decided to leave without saying goodbye.
I need to end the pain and suffering.
The ache in my heart is too much to bear.
Without hesitation, I wince when I glide the razor against my wrist from left to right and watch the blood flow evenly and effortlessly down my skin and onto the floor.
My neck relaxes, causing my head to slack against the wall.
A soft voice whispers, "It will be all over soon. The pain will be gone."
"Yes, no more pain." My words are nearly inaudible.
Darkness overtakes me as I close my eyes and welcome the peace.
* * *
Maverick
Afew days after Seth’s funeral, Skylar had a miscarriage. I was taken aback by how she carried herself after the incident as if it had no impact on her, and she didn't even react emotionally like you'd expect when someone loses a child.
The fucked up part about this was I couldn't help but feel relieved that Skye had lost the baby, even though I knew it was a selfish thought. My hesitation was simple - I wasn't ready to become a father, especially not with her. A moment of weakness—a drunken night—was the cause of it. I'm not excusing my behavior, but it's the truth. When we started hanging out, we made out—a lot but never sealed the deal. I struggled to maintain a healthy relationship with other girls in college due to her clinginess. Skye's obsession with owning me was suffocating, to say the least. The day I found out I was going to star in my own TV series was when she announced her pregnancy. My excitement turned into a sinking feeling that weighed heavily on my chest. I felt my world crumble around me. The thought of being tied to her forever made me want to cry.
As I make a right onto our street, I catch a glimpse of Scar's house. My eyes are immediately fixed on it, hoping to see my Tinkerbelle. I had a mini break before the rest of the scenes were shot, so I decided to return home to check on Scar. I had to see her with my own eyes that she was okay. I was going out of my mind, unable to hear Scar’s voice. I've been trying to contact her, but she's ghosted me. It's pretty obvious she blocked me because my text didn't go through.
Imissher.
I miss hearing her voice.
As I pull into my parent's driveway, my phone buzzes in the cup holder. I groan when I see Skylar's name flashing across the screen. Shifting into park, I answer the call.
"Skylar," I say, turning the ignition off and realizing my parents’ car is gone.
"Where are you?" she asks in an aggravated tone.
I sigh, not wanting to get into it with her. "Willow Oaks." I glance over to Scar's bedroom, across from my old room. Her shades are drawn, but I can see dim light peeking through.
I grew up in a small town called Willow Oaks, Colorado. It is nestled in the foothills of a mountain range, surrounded by dense forests and rolling hills. The town has just a few hundred residents, but it has a charm that draws people in.
"Why are you there? And why didn't you tell me?"
"I don’t have to fucking explain myself, Skye.”
Jesus, this fucking woman.
"We have a contract, Maverick." she reminds me.
