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“I was thinking the same thing. He looked happy, didn’t he?”

Baird nodded. “Cara looked happy as well.”

Ella picked up a dish towel and began buffing the crystal stemware dry. “I hadn’t expected the baby announcement tonight. But Cara can’t hide the bump anymore.”

“I think it was a good thing. It will just make the community even more protective of them.”

“Were you the one who suggested Alec share the news?”

Baird reached for another dessert plate. “No. I would have counseled against it. But in the end, I think it was fine.”

“Why would you have recommended against it?”

“I don’t like children being in the middle of things. I hate to see them exposed to social media. I hate it when adults make money off of them. It’s exploitive.”

Ella paused and looked at him, really looked at him. “You’re going to be a wonderful godfather to the twins.”

He looked embarrassed and said nothing. But once the dishes were done and the counters had been wiped down and dish towels hung up to dry, he filled the kettle with water. “Will you have a cup with me?”

She nodded and pulled out a counter stool and sat down, watching as Baird set out a teapot and two teacups. He opened one of Mrs. Johnson’s baking tins, filling a dessert plate with ginger cookies and shortbread. When the water boiled, he let it sit for a little bit before he poured the hot water over the loose tea leaves. While the tea steeped, he carried the sugar and milk to the counter, along with spoons and a tea strainer.

Once everything was ready, he brought the teapot and teacups to the counter and then sat down next to Ella.

They drank their tea and said not much of anything and then as the cookies disappeared and their tea was almost gone, Baird moved his cup back and looked at her. “I’ve already told Alec that I’m heading back to Edinburgh in the morning, so I’ll be back home for New Year’s Eve.”

She should have expected it, should have been prepared, but she wasn’t. He was leaving again? “When tomorrow?”

“Probably early.”

She said nothing. She dropped her head and fought a wave of intense emotion—sadness and disappointment and regret.

He put a hand out and covered her knee. “I don’t live here, Ella. This isn’t my home, and I’ve never spent this much time at Langley Park. I need to go.”

She nodded, not trusting herself to speak.

“It will probably be quiet here, but it’ll be good for everyone. You and Cara will be able to spend some quality time together, too.”

Ella again nodded, and blinked, fighting to hold back the emotions that were sweeping through her. She would miss him. She didn’t know when she’d see him again. She’d dreaded the goodbye, but it was coming so much sooner than she’d imagined.

“You have plans for New Year’s,” she said, trying to make her voice strong but she still didn’t know where to focus, afraid that if she looked into his eyes, she’d lose her composure entirely.

“There are always plans for New Year’s, but you’re only here until early next week and then you’re back to Washington and your work there.” He hesitated. “I hope we’re parting on good terms. It was difficult last summer and hard on both of us.”

“Was it hard on you?” She glanced up into his face and his warm gold eyes.

“Very hard. You know I care about you.”

“Even then?”

“Yes, Ella,” he said, taking her hand. “Even then. I’ve never left you and thought oh, great, this is a good thing. That’s not how I feel, and that’s not how it works.”

She searched his eyes. “If I didn’t want a family, would you want me?”

“Ella, I want you now. But knowing how important having a family is to you, I can’t in good conscience pursue a relationship with you. There’s no future for us.”

She loved the feel of his hand against hers, his skin so warm, his palm slightly calloused. “Well, there is a future, but it sounds awfully painful because at some point we’d be fighting and saying goodbye.”

“Precisely.” His fingers curled around hers. “It’s hard enough saying goodbye to you now. I can’t imagine how it’d feel in six months, or six years. I don’t know that I could do it.”

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
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