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I think I’d asked this before, but I couldn’t quite remember.
She frowned, a crease forming on her forehead. “I told you, sweetie, he’s at home.”
“I want him here.” I pouted. “He only texted once.”
Joseph made a sound and his eyes fluttered open. He blinked at me and straightened in his chair, wincing as though the awkward angle he’d been sleeping in had hurt his back, which it probably had. It confused me why he was here, but I wasn’t focused on him.
“I want Atlas.”
The drugs made me woozy. It was both a nice and horrible feeling, but I went with it because it was better than the throbbing agony from my knee.
“Baby, it’s still early.” She stood and wobbled, clearly freshly awoken like me, and sat on the bed beside my thigh. “You have your surgery this morning.”
“What for?” I frowned.
Mom sighed, and I realized I was missing something, but I didn’t know what. “Do you remember anything the doctor said?”
“He’s a physician assistant,” I murmured, remembering the blond from earlier. Or last night. Shit. Everything was blurring together, and I didn’t even know what day it was. How many times had I come in and out of consciousness with the meds?
“Not him,” Joseph grunted, standing. He stretched and shifted closer. “The other one. The actual doctor.”
Mom huffed at him. “A PA is important, Joseph. He did a lot of studying, too.” She shook her head and focused back on me. “It’s a bit after seven in the morning, honey. Atlas will be sleeping.”
“Mom, I like him a lot,” I whined, throwing my head back.
Her eyes widened and she smoothed a hand over my forehead. “Shh. You’re not well.”
“But I do.” My voice rose and I tried to sit up straighter, but it was impossible with my leg elevated in a sling. I really needed to piss, too. “I like it when we have sex. He’s kind of smart, you know?”
Mom gasped and glanced at Joseph, who froze, but I continued because I didn’t know what the drama was about. Momknew. She’d even said a bunch of awkward stuff. Something tickled my brain, but I ignored it.
“I like him a lot. Like, I’ve never liked a guy as much as I like Atlas. I like him like a real lot. Like. Yeah.” I groaned and rolled my head against the pillow, the world spinning for a second. I stared up at the pale ceiling, and I thought I saw a small crack in it, but I didn’t know if I was imagining it or if it was really there. “I want him here, with me. He makes me feel safe and I’m kind of scared.” I laughed. “Don’t tell him that. I don’t want him to think I’m a coward.”
Mom whispered something, and it wasn’t to me because when I opened my eyes, she was leaning over and talking to Joseph. His jaw tightened and twitched and there was fire in his eyes. What was wrong?
“Can you call him?” I murmured, popping out my bottom lip. “I’d like him here before I go in for surgery.”
Mom laid her hand over her mouth and she took a deep breath. “Honey, you’re on painkillers right now. You don’t know what you’re saying.”
I did, though. IcravedAtlas being here with me, his arms holding me, his breath tickling my neck. We never had a lot of time to actually cuddle, but when we slept together after fucking, he wrapped me up tight in a warm embrace. He’d always moved away before he woke, so I didn’t think he had any idea that he did it.
Joseph rose, and this time, it wasn’t anger in his eyes, it was something new and heartbreaking. Betrayal. But why? “I’ll tell him you want him here.”
I smiled and gave him a thumbs-up. “Thanks, Joseph. Be a good dad, okay?”
Mom made a strangled sound. “Oh, Wy.”
I didn’t know what I’d done, but I closed my eyes. Hopefully when I woke up again, Atlas would be here.
17
ATLAS
Sittingin my chair at the kitchen table, I blew across the steam floating up from my mug of coffee. Shit, I wasn’t ready for the daylight. Running my finger around the rim, I stared into the black depths. I’d had a terrible night of sleep, and I’d woken up groggy and unable to drop back off, so here I sat.
I hated steroids.
I hated needing stupid shit to keep me alive.
