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“Why are you following me?”
“I’ll always follow you, Sadie.” He proves his point by slipping in behind me as I enter my bedroom, not giving me the chance to close and lock the door. I'm sure that wouldn’t stop him either way.
“This isn’t working,” I tell him.
Dunc pulls his shirt off, wiping his face with it. My eyes drop to his bare chest. Holy crap. My mouth suddenly goes dry. He doesn’t even work out. How does he look like that!
“You’re right.” He tosses the shirt into my laundry basket. My heart sinks at his response, which is stupid. “I can’t hide us. It’s driving me insane.” He closes the space between us. “I know I keep fucking shit up, babe, but I promise you, everything I do, you’re always my first thought.” He tucks a piece of my hair behind my ear. “I don’t hate Van. Sure, he pisses me off, but I know he’s only looking out for you. I’ll try harder.” I can see the sincerity in his eyes.
“Really?” I’m not sure they will ever get along.
“Try. He is a dick.” I smack his chest but can’t help but smile. “Why do you want to hide us?”
“Can you sit over there?” I run my fingers across his bare chest. “It’s hard to think when you’re this close.”And this undressed.
The second he took his shirt off, my body had a reaction. It’s the same one I’ve been fighting every night when he slips into bed with me. He never tries anything. Only pulls me close, burying his face in my neck.
“That is not going to get me to move away from you, babe.”
“Sorry.” I drop my hand.
“Don’t apologize for touching. It is all yours.” He smirks. I roll my eyes at him.
“Go sit.” I point to the chair next to my desk. He actually does what I say, dropping down into it, knocking off a folder in the process. I rush over to grab it and the papers that spilled out, but he beats me to it.
“Sadie.” He holds one of the papers up. “This is a college application.”
“I know.”
“It’s on the other side of the country.”
“It’s nothing.” I grab it from his hand. He starts to flip through the other papers.
“They’re all far away.” He looks up at me. “You’re trying to leave me.” Gone is any smirk or pleading. I can’t really decipher the look he’s currently wearing. It’s a mix of anxiety and betrayal.
“Don’t look at me like that!” My eyes fill with tears again. He snags me around the waist, pulling me into his lap. I end up straddling him. I rest my head on his shoulder.
“Don’t leave, or at least tell me where you’re applying so I can too.”
“You don’t want to go to college.”
His hold on me tightens. “I can’t lose you.”
“I printed those out weeks ago,” I admit. “I wasn’t sure how things were going to work out here with everyone. Sometimes I felt like I didn’t belong.” I lift my head. “You felt that way too, didn’t you? It's why you keep calling Cooper ‘Uncle’.”
I don’t know why this only dawns on me now. Sure, I thought he was annoyed with the turn of events, but I never thought that he could be feeling the same way as I did. He only has a different way of showing it. Where I try to be still and not make waves, Dunc and Van are like hurricanes. Category five ones.
“I don’t know. My head was all messed up between thinking I was losing my dad and then you. But it doesn’t matter. I don’t care because all that shit brought you here. Nothing else matters if I get you out of this. We fit. I’m that family you told me about when we were lying in bed. You said more than anything you want your own family. A couple of kids and a husband. I want to give you that. Let me be that for you.”
“But doyouwant it?” I do want all those things in the future.
“Before you? No fucking way. That shit scared me. I lost my parents. I watched Uncle Coop torn up for years over a girl. I wanted to work and nothing more. Or I’d thought that.”
“And now?”
“Now I know losing you would hurt more than anything. In a crazy way that I’m still trying to understand, because of you, I can let myself see all those possibilities.”
“Dunc.” I drop my forehead to his. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to hide us, but I thought it would cause less problems for everyone. At home and school. I thought it would protect everyone.”
