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“So she was the outgoing extrovert to your shy introvert?” I said.
“Definitely. But it wasn’t always about her. She’d do things with me that I liked too: take me to my favorite movies, go to eat at my favorite restaurants, play my favorite board games. Which made it hard on me when she moved into Aunt Iris’s brownstone for her freshman year of college. I really missed having her around all the time. It never got better either. She grew more involved in university stuff, and it felt as if I never saw her anymore.
“Then, one time when she was home, borrowing money from the parents, she stopped by my room to say hi, only to find me moping around, wishing the next Rick Riordan book would release early. So… Wanting to cheer me up, she offered to let me come stay with her for a week or so over winter break. Then, we’d go home together to open presents on Christmas morning.”
Realizing the story was heading toward her death, my stomach tightened. “Damien,” I said softly, trying to let him know he didn’t have to talk about it if he didn’t want to.
But he kept going.
“I was so excited to get her all to myself for a while. It was December, Friday the thirteenth, and my mom dropped me off in the back that evening after school got out, only to take off before I’d even reached the door. It was locked, but I had a key so I let myself in.
“The island wasn’t there back then, and we had this long, ten-foot table in the kitchen part instead. Thalia had some donuts sitting on it. She knew they were my favorite, so I started to eat them, thinking they had to be for me.
“And while I was standing there, stuffing my face, I heard a thump upstairs. I didn’t think much of it. I remember looking up and calling her name to let her know I was there. Then I heard footsteps. I thought it was her, but when she never came downstairs, I got curious and headed up.”
“Damien, you really don’t have to—”
“She was still alive when I found her.”
“Oh God.”
“He’d stripped her naked and raped her, then cut her from sternum to pubic bone, straight down the middle. Plus, he slit her wrists, her throat, and ankles…like some kind of lab experiment, like he was dissecting a…frog…or something.”
I shook my head and clapped a hand over my mouth as tears filled my eyes.
“Her eyes were open, but I don’t think she could see anything anymore. She wasn’t able to speak either. All she did was gasp out this wheezing sound, and then… She died before I could even turn back around and get help.”
“Holy shit, Damien,” I breathed. “So that was probably the killer, escaping out the roof exit that you heard. Fucking hell, you’re lucky he didn’t go after you too.”
“Probably,” he admitted in a lifeless voice. “Didn’t feel very lucky back then, though.”
“I can only imagine,” I admitted pathetically. “I am so sorry. How the hell are you able to go near this place?”
“Oh, I didn’t for the longest time,” he admitted openly. “I couldn’t. But joining the grief group helped. It was honest-to-God the best thing I ever did. It introduced me to my core group, and now I have friends I know I can trust with anything. Plus, I can talk about Thalia and remember good things about her. I only wish I could figure outwhodid it. And why.”
I bit my lip, and my gut burned with the need to help him figure it out too.
“Maybe this Josh person will lead us to some answers,” he said.
And I nodded immediately. “Yeah. Hopefully.”
“I used to be consumed with wanting to find him,” he admitted. “I read all the serial killer books, made one of those evidence boards with pictures and string on it. The remains of it are still under my bed. And I called the police department weekly, then once every few months after they turned it into a cold case. My friends made me get into running so I’d have another hobby, but nothing was as important to me as getting my sister some justice.”
“What finally made the obsession stop?” I asked because I certainly hadn’t seen this preoccupied side of him.
“It was the strangest thing,” he answered. “I was running one morning and came to her brownstone where I always turned around, but when I glanced over, I saw a face in the window that shouldn’t have been there.”
Realizing he was talking about me, I exhaled slowly.
“You were the first person who could’ve helped me get some real answers, and all I had to do was justaskyou for help. But instead, I found myself wanting to enjoy simply being around you. I started toforgetabout Thalia for longer stretches of time, and instead of being so eaten up with needing to find her killer, I wanted to just focus on living life and getting to see you again.”
“Oh, Damien,” I mumbled sadly.
“I know,” he agreed. “Being too afraid to tell you the truth fucked me over, but… You gave me a new purpose and taught me there was more to life. I think I really needed that. So I want to thank you. Just… Thank you for showing me that I actually want more than just justice. Thank you foreverything. Despite all the regrets I’m having right now, getting to be with you for the time I did is not one of them.”
From the point on, I burst into tears like a leaky faucet.
* * *
