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It’s not that I didn’t love the dress. It was a purple silk wrap-around dress, coming down just above my knee. It was sexy in a discreet and elegant way. It was what Chris Murray’s girlfriend would wear. It was beautiful.
But it wasn’t what I had chosen.
Which was the whole point for him. He wanted control.
And like the stupid girl I was. I gave it to him.
Okay. I shrugged like it was nothing. I put the dress on without fighting.
I made a big mistake.
But how was I supposed to know it was a terrible decision when in exchange for my agreement, he gripped my jaw gently, angled my head perfectly, leaned down, and murmured against my lips,you are such a good girl, Ella.
And he kissed me like he meant it, too.
From then on, everything I did was somehow directed by Chris.
And the little times I fought back…
I squirm under the covers, pressing my thighs together. Chris introduced me to a brand of erotism I had never even thought of in my wildest dreams.
He wasn’t ashamed of saying to my face that he wastrainingme.
He wasn’t the least bit worried that I was too young, too innocent, that he was ruining me for anyone else. If anything, his favorite thing was knowing I would never move on from him once he’d made me exactly the wayhewanted.
And I know now that he succeeded. Because no one compares to him. Hell knows I’ve tried to find someone who could give me what he did.
No one can. It’s his personal brand of torture that I need.
The first time I fought back was the day before the Stoneview Prep Halloween ball.
We were in the car on the way to the gym. My head was still heavy with sleep at six thirty in the morning.
Ella.
Mhm?My chin was resting on my hand, my elbow against the door as I watched the gated mansions on our way to Stoneview Prep.
Did you let Sylvan Morte invite you to the ball?
My heart dropped to my stomach. The calmness in his voice when he was mad was terrifying, but I stayed strong. He might have been angry at me for going to the ball with someone else, but I was fuming that we still had to keep our relationship a secret from my brother.
What was I meant to say? I can’t go with you, can I? Unless you’ve finally grown a pair of balls and want to talk to Luke?
Ella, he said gravely.You’ve been so good. Do you really want to test the limits now? Push the boundaries to see how far I’ll allow you to test me?
Maybe.I could have stomped my foot. It was a good thing we were in the car, and I couldn’t act even more childish.Unless you want to talk to Luke, of course. Then I can tell Sylvan to find a new date. But I’m not going to show up alone just because my boyfriend wants me to be his little secret.
I’m going alone. His patience was wearing thin. I could feel it. I just wasn’t sure what happened when it snapped.
I wanted to push back, and he knew it.
Do it.The whisper was the most threatening thing he’d ever said to me. His eyes were on the road as he turned into our school parking lot.Test me. It’s only normal in a new relationship to see how far you can push the other, isn’t it? As long as you’re willing to pay the consequences.
I’m going to the ball with Sylvan. It took all my strength to say that.
He parked his car, looked at me, and nodded.
That was it.That’swhat happened when good boy Chris Murray snapped? It was almost disappointing.
