AllFreeNovel
Share Us
It’s his brow scrunching with painful relief that gets to me. “Thank you,” he sighs. “Thank you, Sweets.”
I hate to admit that he was right. The hot shower in my en suite bathroom does me good. He lathers my body in my rhubarb and rose shower gel. He massages my shoulders for what feels like hours. He forces me to relax as he kisses my neck.
“You were so good to me,” he murmurs in my ear as his arms wrap around my waist from behind. “You’re always too good to me.”
I know that’s the truth. I am too good to him. I let him do things I shouldn’t.
Chris is a drug that gives me the highest highs and the lowest lows. I’m going to indulge in him and leave him behind when I go back to college.
It’s just for one night.
I turn around in his arms. “You don’t deserve me,” I say softly.
He shakes his head, water dripping from the waves in his light-brown hair. His honey eyes take me in, photographing the image of us in each other’s arms, relishing in our soft moment together.
“I don’t,” he confirms.
His head lowers in the slightest, the only indication that he’s about to capture my lips. A split second later, I’m melting in his arms like the stupid girl I am.
His hands stay at my waist, holding me close to him, my breasts against his warm skin. He doesn’t seek anything sexual, only the touch of two people who used to be in love.
We’re both searching for something we don’t have anymore. For a life we could have had and that he threw away.
When we separate, I swallow back the tears. I feel better than before the shower. I know he was right; I was coming down from the high he gave me.
“How I survived four years without you is a mystery.” His breath fans over my face, and something hits me.
It doesn’t smell of alcohol.
At all.
I fall flat on my feet.
He didn’t taste like someone who’s been drinking. Now that I think of it, before the shower, he didn’t smell of alcohol either.
“You’re not drunk.” I don’t need to ask. It’s obvious he’s not.
His brow furrows slightly, like he’s unsure how he should react. Honesty wins. “No, I’m not drunk.”
“But when you called…”
“I wasn’t drunk.”
“Then why did you? You only call when you’ve had too many drinks.”
He pauses, his eyes roaming over my face, a look of regret shadowing the gold in them. “Every time I called, you wanted to believe I’d been drinking. I went along with it. If you thought I was drunk, that I was just some desperate guy calling his ex after too many beers…if you felt sorry for me, then you’d stay on the phone.”
I try to step away, but he tightens his grip on my waist. “You abused my compassion,” I grit out.
“I was desperate, Ella. Desperation makes you do stupid things.”
“I fuckingknow that. I’m the stupid girl who begged you to stay when you broke up with her.That’sdesperation. You…you’re just some dude who can’t put up with his mistakes.”
“Ella—”
I almost slip when I finally manage to get out of his hold—or when he lets me—but I refuse his helpful hand as I step out of the shower.
I grab my plush towel and flip around. “We agreed. A shower and you’re out. The shower is over.”
