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My strides were steady as I entered the fortress. Not too fast, not too slow. Timing was important when relying upon others.
It wasn't until I entered Casimir's rooms and felt him cross over the ward that I finally spoke. "Back so soon?"
I couldn't keep the contempt out of my tone. He'd made me feel wretched. Unwanted. Like I'd done something wrong and he was the injured party.
Casimir didn't answer, but continued to stare. His eyes were ablaze with a dark fire. His jaw was clenched as he looked at me, as if he were trying to hold back a flood of emotions.
He took a step closer. I stepped back.
I felt my own body responding to his, a strange heat building in my gut. Yearning and something else. Something weighty and painful.
Something that felt an awful lot like guilt.
Casimir stalked me, his steps deliberate and purposeful. I kept retreating until I reached the bathing area. He followed me in, still wordless.
Until he finally spoke.
"I'm scared," he said quietly, his voice full of anguish.
My heart lurched. This male had been a ruthless assassin once upon a time. "Scared of what?"
"I fear what will happen if we fully form the soulbond."
All the self-assurance I'd been cultivating since last night faded in the face of his need. He stepped closer again, where I needed him to be.
He shook his head as if trying to clear away unseen cobwebs. "It is relatively common knowledge that my mother died when my father was killed in battle. The bond took her as surely as the sword that took my father."
The words hung between us like a cloud of smoke, doing nothing to fill the void of his despair. There were so many things I wanted to say, but none of them seemed appropriate or helpful.
So instead I just listened and nodded for him to continue. I could allow him this much, to hear him out and try to understand.
Casimir looked away from me and started pacing back and forth across the room. "The same fate felled my aunt," he said softly, "Draven's mother. He was a youngling at the time. He lost both parents because of that fucking bond before he'd made it to ten years of age. I vowed I'd never follow any of them down that tragic path."
Casimir glared at my left hand, which hung loosely at my side. "A soulbond is a death sentence, Raven, and I fear I've just become your eventual executioner."
He looked away then, as if ashamed of what he'd revealed. There was no need for shame. I understood the fear behind his words.
Yes, he'd hurt me last night, but I understood why he felt that way. I could even imagine myself forgiving him and working through the issue together.
It made what I was about to do all the more costly. Would he be able to forgive me?
Not if you're dead, my inner witch slighted. Though, if I were killed, at least he would live.
Without warning Casimir closed the gap between us and grabbed hold of my arms gently but firmly, pulling me into him until our foreheads were touching and we were breathing as one entity.
I let myself fall into the moment, imagining a future I might never see.
A warning tickled the back of my neck from the ward I'd reset this morning. I had roughly half a minute left before we had visitors.
I took a step to the side, entering the shower. Casimir's furrowed brow soon rose with interest.
I had to hurry. Conjuring a dagger, I lifted my arm and sliced across the skin just below my elbow. Blood flowed down my arm, dripping onto the tile below.
"What in the hell are you doing?" he shouted hoarsely, grabbing a hand towel off the sink and stepping into the shower.
As soon as his body came through the barrier at the end of the stall, I stepped out, careful to make sure I felt the spell absorb some of what I'd offered it.
"Was it enough?"
