AllFreeNovel
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When I get back from my two-mile light jog that felt like a ten mile all-out run, I toss my phone in my bedside drawer and slam it closed before getting in the shower. In the shower, I obsess over the fact that Aubrey still hasn’t texted me back. The obsessive thoughts lead to thinking of how nice it felt to have her in my arms last night on the water tower.
Before I know it, I’m painfully aware of how long it’s been since I’ve had sex. I handle my business in the shower, shamelessly thinking of Aubrey the entire time. I think of the soft skin of her arms under my fingertips, the way her hair felt as it tickled my cheek, and the scent of her shampoo as it filled my senses. I couldn’t tell you even one word to describe the type of perfume or shampoo any other girl I’ve been with used. But, I could pick out the scent of Aubrey in a blind smell test with ease, I’m certain of it.
I have enough self-control to get dressed before checking my phone. When I pull it out of the drawer and light the screen up, my stomach drops. Still no new text messages. I debate sending another text to her or maybe even calling, but open my group chat with my best friends instead.
Me: Anyone free to hang?
Madison: Racing to work now, sorry.
Jesse: Stuck at work until 5, gotta save up money to buy fuzzy dice for the mini.
Even though no one is around to see, I roll my eyes and laugh out loud at Jesse’s comments.
Ender: Also at work today, sorry bud.
Ender: And Mads… you better not be texting and driving.
Ender and Mads send a few flirty emojis in the group chat and I get an unfamiliar pang of jealousy.
Tay: Okay. Get a room you two.
Tay: Emmett, come pick me up! I’ll meet you outside the dorms in ten?
Me: On my way.
Taylor and I have always been especially close. She may have teased me about my tendency to be, let’s call it ‘free’, with my love for the ladies, but she never judged me. In fact, she was always the first to ask for details.
Since my diagnosis, though, she’s been a bit distant. She only ever came to visit me solo once or twice and she’s missed more group hangs than is typical for her. I thought about bringing it up to Jesse, but didn’t want to pry.
When I pick her up, she seems to be her usual bubbly self and chats away as I drive us over to Sheridan to eat at one of our favorite Mexican restaurants.
When the waitress drops off our chips, salsa, and guacamole, I dig in. I’m starving after my run this morning and I haven’t been able to keep Mexican food down for months. I’m getting ready to shovel my fourth guacamole filled chip into my mouth when I notice Taylor is just sitting there, staring at me.
I pause the chip in front of my open and waiting mouth.
“What?” I ask her.
Taylor shakes her head and lets out a small chuckle.
“You’re still seeing her, aren’t you?” she says.
I don’t know how she does that, but I still try to pretend I don’t know what she’s alluding to.
“I don’t even know what you’re talking about,” I say and shove the chip in my mouth.
“No, no no,” Taylor says, “Our waitress was a five foot nine blonde with some of the perkiest tits I’ve ever seen and you didn’t even look at her once.”
She crosses her arms across her own chest and falls back into the booth seat, staring at me, waiting for a response.
Taylor isn’t going to back down on this, so with a heavy sigh, I relent. I tell her everything about the past few weeks since she met Aubrey at the football game. About our lunches and the water tower. I don’t, however, tell her about the church and the marriage predicament. I tell her about Aubrey’s lack of response today, though.
By the time I’m done, a tear escapes Taylor’s right eye and rolls down her cheek.
“No,” I say, pointing a finger at her before shoveling another chip with salsa on it in my mouth. “Don’t you dare.”
Taylor swats at the rogue tear and sits upright, composing herself.
“Emmett, I—I’m sorry I haven’t been there enough for you. I just, I have been so scared these past few months. I thought we were all invincible and I know it’s selfish, but the thought of losing you really made me evaluate my own life and well—”
