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"I do stay here sometimes," I said, kissing her jaw. "As often as you letme."
"I thought, maybe," she continued, "if you had a key, you wouldn't have to wait for me to finish up at the hospital. You could just come here, and—and maybe you could stay here. As much as you want. Or, I don't know, all thetime."
"All the time?" I repeated. "Like,officially?"
"My parents have been telling people we're engaged for the past month and a half," she said. "How much more official do youneed?"
"That's a good point," I said, nodding. I did not regret announcing my intentions to Alex's parents last month. I did regret putting her in the murky position of fielding congratulatory messages and engagement gifts from her parents' friends back in Nevada. And because I created my own chaos, I'd told her I was going to marry her but hadn't actually proposed. Every day shambles right here. "It would be strange if I didn't livehere."
"That's what I'm screaming about," shesaid.
I took the portrait and the key, and set them both on the coffee table. "I mean, we're basicallymarried."
"Basically," shereplied.
I blinked at her as the moment pulsed betweenus.
Am I supposed to do this now? Get down on one knee and ask her to have me, body, soul, andshambles?
There was a voice in the far back of my mind suggesting that I move "basically" to "actually." I went right on blinking like a damnowl.
"Hey,Riley?"
I don't even have aring.
"Yeah?" I replied, choking on air in theprocess.
I can't do this without aring.
"Thank you for my drawing," she said, her cheeks heating as she spoke. "It feels like you put everything intoit."
Even if I had a ring, I didn't know what I was supposed tosay.
"I did," Iadmitted.
I don't know what to say or how to say it, and I don't have a ring. I am anidiot.
"I love it, and I love you," shesaid.
Is this it? Is this myopening?
"I've been stressing about this gift all week long," Alex continued. "I'm so relieved that you didn't freak out and tell me it's too soon to talk about livingtogether—"
"Basically married,remember?"
Just fucking do it. Do it now, fix the mistakeslater.
"Right," she said, laughing. "Since we've sorted that out, I want holiday movies, those cookies from the party, and mybed."
I ran my hand down her back and palmed her ass while I kissed her neck. "Are you kicking me out,Honeybee?"
"No, no," she said. "You're coming to bed withme."
This isn't ouropening.
But also, itis.
"I'm going to marry you someday." I stood, Alex still cradled in my arms, and headed toward the bedroom. "Tonight, I'm gonna strip you naked and paint some holly leaves on your tits. I haven't decided where I'm drawing the mistletoe yet. I might experiment with that one. Soundgood?"
