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I love them more!I choke on a raw breath but cage my emotions, hold back my glistening tears. Neo had to fucking work for everything. Thanatos will, too. Except, I will set the stage this time.
“The water is icy cold, but you may warm it with your Halo,” Death mentions as I begin to slide the strap of my chemise down the curve of my shoulder. So comfortable with him. Nothing like Neo. And why not? He’s already stripped me to my most vulnerable level. He knows the rawest, deepest part of me in a way Neo never could.
Because Thanatos was there.
“I’ll get in…” Feeling mischievous, I smirk and incline my neck so I may gesture, “…but only if you join me.”
When Thanatos blinks, the black hole of his eyes subsiding to reveal not silver but father-fuckinggold!—I thrill in that tiny but splendorous victory. I clench my hands to prevent myself from clapping and jumping up and down. Claiming his shock and that seductive gold as a holy rolling stone, I define, “If I am going to get all wet and wanting, it’s only fair that you be, too. Besides, I need someone to wash the blood from my back.” I border on squealing as I test him.
With heat swelling within my entire being and flushing my cheeks, I shrug the chemise from my shoulders so it pools to the floor. Thanatos’ control confounds me because his eyes do not retreat from mine. Not even to blink. As if he is not eventempted. By now, Neo’s eyes would be vagabonds roaming my body.
“I will join you, Elysia. But only if you resist the urge to compare me to my brother.”
His words are a scythe piercing right through my Haloed heart. His words have exposed my soul far more than I’ve hinted. Sighing, the back of my neck hot with shame, I slide into the bath…and go deep. When I emerge, I almost expect to find Thanatos centimeters from my face. Instead, he waits for me to rise, then immediately positions himself behind me.
When I open my mouth to object to his full garb, Thanatos leans down and murmurs in a voice like a winter’s night, “Do not ever ask me to remove my clothes.” His hands cup a collection of dead rose petals, then compile them along my shoulders. They feel like soft sackcloth. “In your words…we are not there yet.”
“Yet?”
I lean into him. Though the water is icy, I decide not to heat it. I welcome the gooseflesh budding along my skin, tranquilizing the heated orb of my gold flesh.
Thanatos drapes the blossom scraps lower till I sense the water reddening from the blood paint. I chew on my inner cheek, uncomfortable at the pinkish water, until Thanatos touches one finger to the liquid, obliterating the blood. My lips part in a silent gasp. Neo would cup a handful…he would suck—
“Elysia.” A solitary warning from behind me. Not a growl. Thanks to the bond and as my soul is bared, he knows all my thoughts, my emotions.
“I’m sorry,” I apologize and press the heel of my palm to my head. “In the real world, thoughts…musings are not easily read. Even with mine and Neo’s bond, we can still shut the door…” I shake my thoughts out, wishing I could execute them as easily as Thanatos.
“I can teach you.”
“What?” I swing my head back, chin in line with the curve of my shoulder.
“To control your thoughts just as my brother has taught you to control your Halo and emotions.”
Raising my legs so I may touch my chin onto my knees, I consider his offer. Do I want to feel indebted to Death? He already owns the greatest chunk of my soul, even if he hasn’t used it against me…yet. I remember his words in his Tower. I remember Nita’s confirmation:he plays the long game.
Pinching my lips and furrowing my brow, I shake my head. I refuse to be his pawn.
While Thanatos scrubs away the last of the blood, I ask, “Why did you summon me tonight?”
“You called for me in our bond. I answered.” Finished with my back, Thanatos scatters the dead rose petals. A few land on my sodden curls like an offering.
“At least you kept your promise.” After all, he did tell me in the desolation of his Tower that he would protect me fromDestruction. Licking my lips, I recognize my mentalNoralicewas a cry for help, and Thanatos chose to come to my aid.
“While he was away…” I prompt him, rubbing my lips together to boldly approach his throne with an accusatory question, “You did not summon me for weeks. Why?”
Brushing aside my curls, combing his fingers to raise my hair above my neck, Thanatos bends his cool mouth to his brand in a brush of a kiss and confesses, “You needed to learn to sleep on your own.”
I snap my head back, flicking my eyes to seek his gold beyond the dark holes.
At first, Thanatos deadpans in a silent stalemate because we both know he owes me absolutely nothing. If anything, I owe him. No, I scold my inner landscape, my spine prickling. I will never owe the Prince of Death or Destruction anything. Chin rising, I remind myself that I am the Halo-Bearer. Higher than them. Some nagging voice at the back of my mind whispers its treason: not in the Soul Plane.
So, I seek Elysium, paradise in Thanatos’ iris orbs, and his ice shivers the hairs on the nape of my neck.
Who the fuck am I courting?
Thanatos relents, shoulders dropping, chest lifting to take a deep breath—as if he’s taking a leap of faith. He reveals the truest glimmer of his eyes. I arch my neck, and a raspy gasp escapes my throat. I whimper. Tears shimmer on the corners of my eyes as I behold the expansion of those irises that remind me of a morning star. Of honey from the hive, autumn fruits, and golden sunlight. While I bear a ring of gold, Thanatos holds the very entrance to heaven like an angel’s ladder. The gloriola and crown of the constellations. Ten billion chandeliers could never hope to compete.
Nearly blinded, I somehow harness the strength to keep staring…just as I faced Neo’s dilated pupils on my wedding night. My heart ricochets in my chest until Thanatos finally narrows those effervescent orbs to a slit, “SweetElysia…” he speaks my name in a low hum of a blessed recitation.
