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She frowned, her arms crossed over her chest. ‘But you used me. You went to bed with me simply to get to Grace. You used me as a way to get to her.’
He rubbed his forehead with his hand. ‘I know. That’s what I had planned. I thought I could seduce my way into getting your co-operation, and expected to be able to walk away afterwards.’
‘Which is exactly what you did.’
‘No, I blew it completely. I thought that if I got close to you and seduced you you’d tell me everything I needed to know. But after three nights with you I was angrier than ever. I’d planned to sweet-talk the information out of you after we’d made love—when you were most accommodating, when you would least expect it—’
Her eyes flashed blue fire up at him. He felt her pain at his betrayal and her anger that he’d brought it all back.
‘I told you I’m not proud of what I did. But I couldn’t go through with it. Like I said, after three nights I couldn’t bear the thought that you were like her, that you might be turning into another Della-Bosca.’
‘But I wasn’t!’
His eyes held hers. ‘I know that now. But back then I was going crazy. I’d heard Olympia was back in the country, and word was she was about to have surgery. Which meant I’d run out of time with you.’ He sighed and ran one hand through his hair. ‘But I wasn’t ready to give you up.’
‘You mean you hadn’t got the evidence you wanted.’
‘No,’ he said, shaking his head. ‘That was what I convinced myself of, certainly. But what was more important was that I didn’t want to lose you. I was angry with Olympia because she was coming back too soon, so that my time with you was limited.
‘And I was angry with you,’ he continued, ‘because after spending time with you I wanted so much for you to be different from the person I feared you were. So instead of treading softly-softly, instead of taking things as slowly as I could with what time I had left, instead of gently eking out any details I could before you realised what I was about, I blew it. And then, of course, the more you defended Della-Bosca, the angrier I became.’
She thought back, her mind returning to that night he’d collected her after work and driven them to the beach house, his mood volatile, his eyes dark and hostile. And yet they’d enjoyed their most tender lovemaking yet. Only for the magic to descend into that sudden outburst—his demands to know what was going on with his sister, his seemingly mad accusations against Grace.
That night had signalled the end for them. He’d used her and deceived her and shredded her feelings in the process.
‘It doesn’t make sense. You were never going to have much time. And yet you had three nights, and you never once asked about Grace or the clinic. I had no idea what you had in mind. Why did you wait so long if you were so desperate to save your sister?’
‘Because I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I didn’t want to risk making you suspicious. I wanted you just the way you were.’
She turned towards the harbour view and she laughed, low and bitter, into the balmy night air. ‘You mean naïve, gullible, and easy to be taken for a fool.’
‘No!’ She heard him cross the terrace till he pulled up behind her. ‘I mean warm, sensual, and every part a woman.’
She felt his breath stir the ends of her hair; she felt his words as low vibrations in her senses.
‘I thought I’d found something special—someone special—and I wasn’t prepared to lose you then. And the way you felt in my arms…’ He rested one hand on her shoulder. ‘I thought you felt something too.’
Warmth flooded her from where his hand rested, flowing through her flesh, his proximity triggering a tingling awareness in her skin. It was all she could do to fight the urge to be drawn against him.
She battled to hold herself stiff, trying to ignore the fact that with one small turn she would be in his arms, the one place she’d been dreaming about being for months. But she was sick of unhappy endings. Why would this time be any different just because Loukas had a guilty conscience?
‘I thought I did,’ she admitted, not wanting to give too much away, but wanting him to know something of what he had cost her—had cost them both.
