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Was it recognition?
Was it acceptance?
Or was it something that Scarlet suddenly craved from the depths of her twisted soul.
Forgiveness.
22
“Ask for forgiveness, not permission. Isn’t that the saying?” Benson flashed his trademark grin in Kaiser’s direction. “Now you know the story with Rhett. I’ve come clean with you. So just trust me and follow my lead so we can close this out the right way. The Darkwater way.”
Kaiser didn’t move from where he sat behind his desk. His eyes narrowed briefly, eyebrows twitching with suspicion. “You’re a piece of fucking work, John. How can I believe a damn word you say anymore? I’m not even sure I can tell when you’re lying these days. Maybe it’s because you’re so convinced that you’re always right, always justified, always in control. Except you’re not. Senator Robinson is right. You’re off your rocker, and I’ve let our friendship cloud my judgment.”
“Glad to hear we’re still friends.” Benson managed to keep grinning, forced a wink that he hoped looked nonchalant enough. But he damn well knew with sickening certainty that those choices he’d made thirty years ago were drawing the players together now, the power of their emotional connections reaching across space and time, arranging events and accidents as that vortex of energy began to spin harder, faster, deeper, darker.
Of course, thirty years ago Benson was still an amateur when it came to playing the great game. Looking back now it was clear that he’d been setting the board without really understanding the consequences, without really acknowledging his own hand in how it would play out, without really accepting his own responsibility for those questionable choices he’d made with that innocent infant, that dark-eyed girl who should have died twice but somehow did not, like her spirit kept clinging to the flesh, simply would not let go.
Kaiser groaned softly, took a noisy breath, let it out while shaking his head. He’d been shaking his head for about twenty minutes now, mostly in stunned disbelief as Benson came clean about what he’d done thirty years ago to bring Rhett Rodgers into the CIA, deploy him into the shadows of the NOC program.
Only to watch Rhett emerge from those very same shadows like a bad dream, a fucking nightmare, fate playing out in a way Benson very much didnotanticipate, destiny delivering a twist that Benson knew could very well bring down not just Darkwater but Martin Kaiser too, potentially putting a snake like Rhett Rodgers in charge of the world’s most powerful intelligence agency.
It was all spinning badly out of control, Benson thought grimly as he waited for Kaiser to respond. Diego Vargas was still out there. Rhett Rodgers was almost untouchable without any evidence linking him to the O’Donnell setup. Nancy Sullivan had cut ties with Benson and Darkwater. And it looked dangerously likely that Martin Kaiser was about to do the same.
“Let me get this straight,” Kaiser finally said, squaring himself behind the dark walnut desk and casting a seething glare at Benson. “You kept this Rhett Rodgers thing from me for three decades. Now that it’s come back to bite you in the ass, you show up here, spill it all in a rush of word-vomit, then sit back and expect me to clean it up for you.” He let out a scoff dripping with disbelief. “The answer is no. We’re done.You’redone. Now get the fuck out of my office, John. This is over. I want Wagner and O’Donnell on a plane back to the United States. I’m going to do this by the book, and I’ll deal with the consequences. Fuck, I should have my head examined for even bringing you in on this thing. Just more proof that maybeIshouldstep down. Should have done this by the book to begin with. But instead I get pulled into another one of your Darkwater games.”
“This isn’tmygame,” Benson said, doing his best to stay calm, to hide the anxiety clawing at his throat. “It’s Rhett’s game, and he’s going to win if you do this by the book.”
Kaiser snorted, shook his head, rubbed his bloodshot eyes. “Listen to us, John. We’ve been operating outside the rules for so long we can’t evenconsiderdoing things by the book.”
Benson snorted back. “That’s why the Agency exists, Martin. Because America and the world needs people like us, men and women who can walk that line between good and bad, ruthless bastards like us with enough of a moral compass that we don’t get completely lost when we step into the shadows.”
“Yeah, well, you just confirmed that your moral compass hasn’t been pointing true north since the very beginning.” Kaiser’s fingertips rapped on the desk like he wanted a cigarette. He sighed, then clamped his fingers into fists and glared at Benson. “Why the hell are you still here? I said it’s over. Make the call to Wagner, get them on a plane—cargo transport or charter flight or fucking Air India, if that’s what it takes. I don’t give a shit how. Just do it.”
Benson took a breath, stroked his chin as he exhaled. “Can’t.”
“This isn’t a request. It’s a damn order.”
Benson shook his head. “No, I really can’t do it. Ice Wagner seems to have destroyed his Darkwater phone.”
Kaiser sighed. “So call his damn hotel room.”
“Tried, but there’s no answer. Had the front desk send someone to knock on the door, but there’s a DO NOT DISTURB sign outside and so the hotel won’t knock.” Benson shrugged. “I could say it’s an emergency, but we don’t know what’s happening up there. There’s a chance Rhett activated an NOC operator, and we don’t want any innocent hotel employees getting killed.”
“Fuck.” Kaiser’s face clouded darker than the walnut floorboards. “What about Edwin Moses?”
Benson raised an eyebrow. “You’re kidding, right? If there’s really an assassin in that hotel, Moses is only going to get himself killed—and then we’ve got a bigger mess on our hands. Besides, we might need Moses later if things do get messy at the hotel. He took care of those bodies at the safe-house. He’s good at that kind of mop-up work, but we can’t drop him in the middle of a live operation. You know that.”
Kaiser narrowed his gaze like he was trying to figure out if Benson was bullshitting him. But Benson wasn’t. He knew better than to push it too far. It was one thing to hide information from Kaiser, another to straight up lie to the man. Kaiser was one of two people on earth who could see through Benson’s bullshit.
The other was Nancy Sullivan, and Benson sorely missed her steady hand on the wheel. Right now she’d be figuring out a way to contact Ice and Indy without endangering the hotel staff or Moses. Benson wasn’t good at these sorts of logistical details. Didn’t have the patience for it. Was only as technically savvy as he needed to be to handle his phone and computer.
“All right, well, if you’ve lost control of your Darkwater man, all the more reason to get the hell out of my office. I’ll take it from here.” Kaiser snatched up the black desk phone and punched a button. “Get me the Embassy in Mumbai. Yes, I’ll hold.”
Benson calmly stood from the straight-backed chair, leaned across Kaiser’s desk, tapped the reset button on the desk phone to kill the call. “You can’t bring O’Donnell back to the U.S. in official custody. CIA is a civilian agency, not law enforcement. Which means that the moment O’Donnell steps onto U.S. soil the FBI takes over. And you don’t want that. Nobody wants to give the damn FBI an excuse to pull back the covers on how we do things at Langley.” Benson sat back down. “The Presidential Primaries are coming up. If it comes out that the FBI is investigating the CIA for a possible traitor, the press will be all over it. You’ll have to resign—which maybe you’re ready to do, but not like this, not disgraced after decades of service.” Benson shook his head. “But more than that, you can’t do this because you know in your heart that O’Donnell is being set up. You also know there’s solid electronic evidence implicating O’Donnell. The FBI will absolutely use it to get a conviction and take O’Donnell down for this. You can’t allow that. You’re a cold-hearted snake when you need to be, Martin. And God knows we’ve both turned our backs on assets and operatives when we had to do it for the greater good. But she’s just a kid, Martin. Caught up in something that has nothing to do with her.”
Oreverythingto do with her, Benson thought harshly as the last sentence caught in his throat. He broke eye contact and stood, hoping feverishly that Kaiser didn’t catch the needle of a lie hidden inside a haystack of truth.
Kaiser’s jaw tightened as he took a long hard look at Benson. Then with a sigh he pulled the handset away from his ear, slammed it down into the cradle. “Damn it, John. No, I don’t want the FBI crawling all over us. All right. We’ll wait until you can get back in touch with Wagner and O’Donnell.” He tilted his head back, narrowed his eyes up at the standing Benson. “Why did Wagner destroy his phone?”
