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Marrisa appears in big bold letters with a red heart next to the name on the screen.
He lets go quickly, turning to me and telling me to stay put. Walking away briskly, he rubs a hand over his face before answering the call.
“Hey, baby,” he says into the phone.
My heart drops and the reality of the situation rushes over me. I’ve been right all along. Xavier might like me, but he would never pick me over his girlfriend. The aching feeling I felt all those years ago hits me like a semi-truck.
Chapter35
Violetta (PAST)
Everything in my body is telling me not to do what I’m about to do. But my body aches at the thought of him. I just turned sixteen and I want him to know that I love him.
He makes my soul sing and every time I’m with him, I can’t stop thinking about his voice or the way he laughs when I mention something stupid. I want him. I just hope he feels the same way.
His sister and I see each other every day, but León is never in the picture really. But today he is. We’re all at a dinner with our two families at my best friend’s family’s hacienda in Sinaloa. The first time I looked around, I was in awe; this place is beautiful.
But it might not feel the same after I tell León how I feel. I know he’s older than me, but I don’t care. I’ve loved him for a whole year now and it’s the first time it’s stayed this long. It has to be fate. I am determined.
León isn’t at the table; he went outside for what I can assume is for a smoke. Taking the easy way out, I tell my parents I need to go to the bathroom when really, I plan to go talk with León. Walking in the direction of the bathroom, I pass the door that leads out of the dining room and into the kitchen, with a sliding glass door that leads to the gardens. I take my hand, sliding it aside quietly, hoping no one will hear my frantic state. Shutting the door behind me, I move briskly from the vantage point where my family could possibly see me.
Once I know I’m safe, I walk down the steps and to the hedge where smoke is slowly coming out from behind it. That’s when I know he’s there. My feet take me slowly in his direction, my body wanting to run.
But my mind stays focused on the task ahead.
If I can’t tell him, nothing could possibly happen. At least if I get the words out at some point, then I could have the slight possibility of ending this ache. A single part of me is scared of the reality of my feelings. I love him in a way I can’t explain. My gaze is always attentive to León’s movements. My heart beats when he talks to me and I lose my breath when I see him in a black suit.
Looking behind the hedge, I see a tired León. His head hits the green leaves behind him as he sighs out into the free air. The bags under his eyes make his exhaustion apparent, not to mention how he is always talking with his dad about business. I know what his family does for a living now. At first, I thought they were just billionaires who started a company from the ground up. In a way, they did, but their actions are not in the slightest way legal. It fazes me occasionally, knowing that if my dad does something to upset the family, it could possibly lead to our demise.
Adjusting my purple-violet slip-on dress with my hands, I muster up as much courage as I can possibly find. My feet move before my brain processes anything that’s going on, but once they take me forward, I know I’m going to tell him.
I just hope I don’t mess it up.
I’m fully visible to his view now. He doesn’t look in my direction until a branch breaks under my feet. His head snaps up and his eyes are alarmed at first until he slouches in relief.
“Perdon, no quería asustarte,” I tell him. My voice is already shaky as I feel anxiety and alarm running through my blood.
Our conversation continues in Spanish. “Don’t worry, Vio,” he tells me, taking a drag of his cigarette.
I’ve always hated when people smoke. I think it’s the least attractive thing someone can do. But when León does it, I look at him in infatuation.
My morals are skewed when I’m around him. I don’t care that he’s the heir to the biggest cartel in the world or that he smokes a cigarette when he’s stressed. I just want him, despite all of that.
When love comes into the picture, nothing else stands in its way. He could be the cruelest man on earth, and I would still adore him with every fiber of my being.
“What are you doing out here?” he asks as I walk toward him, leading me to stand next to him, shoulder to shoulder.
He doesn’t look at me, but I turn my gaze to face him. León may never look at me, but he’s always the center of my attention. “I need some fresh air from that.” My hand waves around the house, mentioning our families inside the stuffy dining room.
He chuckles, and the smoke escapes his lips. “I get it.” He nods in understanding.
We stand in silence after his last words. I feel slightly uncomfortable with the tension I’m most likely imagining in the air.
You can do this, Vio!I tell myself internally, mentally groaning a few times. The words don’t want to fly into the air, knowing he might deny me. But I have to. I’m in pain every moment I see him, knowing that he would never know my feelings.
“I think I love you!” I shout in his direction.
León falters before his eyebrows wrinkle in surprise.
