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Find everything that’s the color green.
I close my eyes, trying to focus before they flutter open to the city in front of me.
I count each green thing I see. Green trees line the streets. My head rings with my own voice as I count each and every single one of them.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight…
I keep counting for another ten minutes before I find lights that are the same color. After finishing adding those up, I move to bushes and people’s clothing.
I make it to the number forty before my breath regulates and my heart is beating at a steady beat. Running my hand over my face, I slouch in relief. Anxiety attacks make me feel like I’m collapsing slowly, drowning in my own thoughts.
All I can think of when they happen is that I want it to stop.
Before I fully comprehend the result of my anxiety attack, I gaze at my surroundings. I’m high up, way too high up.
I take a step back, hitting something behind me.
I turn around to the only person I don’t want to see right now.
Xavier, looking down in my direction. I gulp before turning my head away from him.
“I told you to stay put,” he tells me sternly.
I roll my eyes; he wants me to stay put while he talks to his girlfriend before he almost kissed me. I want to rub that in his face, scream at him. But my resolve doesn’t let me, so I stay silent.
“Are you going to say something?” he questions.
“What do you expect me to say? This is the most you’ve said to me in days. So maybe you’ll get the same treatment from me in return.” I quirk an eyebrow in his direction.
“Vio, don’t be like this—”
I cut him off immediately. “Like what?” I yell at him.
He stills at my outburst. When I realize his surprise, a sigh leaves my lips.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him, apologizing for my abrupt shout. I may be mad at him right now, but we can deal with this like adults. I don’t have to yell to get my point across.
“I didn’t talk to you because things were getting intense between us,” he tells me, running a hand through his hair in frustration.
“Well, you could have communicated that with me instead of ignoring me completely.” I want to cry, but I hold back every tear threatening to escape as my eyes start to water.
“No, don’t cry, I don’t like it when you cry.” Xavier’s face is in anguish.
“What do you expect? I came to a country that I don’t even know because I thought my friend would be here for me. But he did the opposite by only talking to my sisters and ignoring me for days,” I tell him and a tear runs down my cheek. I wipe it away quickly.
“Your best friend.” He tries to correct it while a massive grin spreads across his face.
“Don’t you start with that face,” I scold.
“What face?” Xavier questions. A hint of mischief twinkles in his eyes.
“You know what you’re doing.” My finger sternly points at him.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He shrugs.
“You hurt me,” I let out.
That’s when that smile dissipates from his face. “That is never my intention, Vio,” he tells me.
