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“Breakfast?” Nick asked Ava as he waved a plate of jam covered toast in Ava’s face. He had a glass of orange juice in his other hand and a cheeky grin on his face as he blocked her view.
I heard her stomach growl, and she snatched the plate from him as he laughed. “Did I sleep one night or two?” she asked.
“Two,” Nick answered as he grabbed another plate off a tray and sat down next to her. There were some eggs and a little bacon, too. But I knew we were rationing stuff like that now. We were sending a lot of food to town every day until we could get them better established with their own food supply.
Ava seemed happy eating just the toast. She lived with five tall, fit guys, and Wolf had serious bulk. They needed the protein, and she’d know that. Besides, I knew she didn’t enjoy having a heavy breakfast, something Nick had clearly noticed as well. I’m sure he would have piled her plate with eggs and he would have gone without if he’d thought she wanted some. It was just the type of guy he was. They all were.
When I’d first heard about packs, I’d wondered if there were enough decent alphas in the world to make the risk of meeting your mates worthwhile. What if you ended up mated with an asshole? The world was full of them. Now I knew there were a lot more good alphas out there than I’d known.
I gazed at Ava and Nick as I munched my toast. Nick watched her carefully, making sure she ate enough. They were cute together. But I also noticed the way his eyes kept running over the hair cascading down her shoulders and chest. He couldn’t take his eyes off it. She usually had it piled high on her head, but today it was all loose flowing waves and it was gorgeous. He brushed a strand away from her face and she smiled at him.
Ava was pretending not to watch Wolf and me, but she kept shooting us surreptitious glances.
We were sitting on the adjacent couch together and the space between us felt filled with a potent mix of awkward tension and electricity. Sparks were firing all over me. I tried hard not to look at him, but it felt as if every molecule in my body was straining towards him. His energy had felt muted since we got back, but now it felt even more pronounced. He didn’t touch his breakfast, and he was holding himself impossibly still. It hardly even seemed to be breathing. I couldn’t deny that I was in heat and it was influencing both of us.
I didn’t like feeling him so muted. I’d watched him charge across the lawn at the manor, a pure unleashed beast. Then felt the surge of power he’d channeled from the three packs, as he’d knocked out a hundred alphas. It had been exhilarating and humbling to know he was mine.
Now, a growing ache I’d felt since yesterday afternoon, that had built slowly at first, had reached a fever pitch that made my bite marks burn. I’d slept restlessly last night and this morning I’d been driven to the bathroom to relieve the pressure of my dick straining against my pants. The guys had made excuses and left, trying to give me some privacy. It had been useless anyway. No matter how much I stroked myself, it wasn’t what I needed. My body was demanding an alpha. The drumbeat of building need in my veins, and the desperate tension in my body as I tried to make myself come, was why I hadn’t noticed Ava up and about.
I’d been trying to hold off for her. I needed her here for this, but I hadn’t wanted to wake her after what she’d been through. It had felt selfish, and her welfare was more important to me than my own.
Yet now that we’d found her and were back in the cabin, I wasn’t sure how to broach the mechanics of it. Wolf and I were both waiting for the other to make a move. I wanted the mating desperately. I could feel how much Wolf did, too.But who would take the lead? Would Wolf be okay if I did? Would he like what I wanted to do to him? What if our needs weren’t compatible? He was a prime alpha. What if he needed to be in control?
I tried to eat some more, knowing I’d need energy for my heat once it took hold. But the food got stuck around the lump in my throat. I coughed and choked a little. Out of nowhere, Ryder was there, patting me on the back forcefully. He must have had the world’s quickest shower. I looked up at him to nod in thanks and almost groaned when I noticed he hadn’t gotten fully dressed. He’d just thrown on a pair of sweats, and beads of water were still rolling down his chest and dripping from his damp hair.
“What’s this?” Ryder asked as he waved my leather-bound journal in his hand.
Shit, I must have left it lying on the side table earlier. I tried to lunge and grab it, but he easily held me off with one hand. He plonked himself on the arm of the couch, forcing me to shift closer to Wolf. We were inches apart and I could almost feel his body heat searing me.
“Is this a diary?”
“No, it’s a writing journal,” I told him, as I shot him a sideways glance. I’d given up trying to grab it from him. There was no way I’d win. He was way too agile, and much too fast. Plus, his six-pack abs were in my eyeline, distracting me.
I didn’t know why Ryder turned me on when River didn’t. They were identical, but there was just something about Ryder that intrigued me. There was a curiosity there, a feeling of something that could be fun and lighthearted. Maybe it was just the way he wore his heart on his sleeve that drew me to him. River had warmed up, especially towards Nick. There was a bromance blooming there. But he still had a cool, reserved demeanor about him. He was always thinking ten steps ahead and strategizing. Wolf may be the most dominant alpha out of the three, but even he deferred to River.
“For writing stories?” Ryder asked, jolting me back to the moment. “Can I read them? I love reading and I don’t have any books with me.”
“Oh, uh. I’ve never shown them to anyone before. I don’t think they’ll be your thing. They’re kind of smutty.” I couldn’t look him in the eye.
“Even better, I love smut. Paranormal and fantasy romance are my favorites,” he said easily, as he slipped off the leather thong that held it closed and flicked through some pages. “Let me find a steamy bit.”
“It’s true,” River said. “He has them stuffed everywhere and usually travels with a few in his go bag.”
“I love epic fantasy, but I’ve read everything we have here at the farm,” Nick piped in. “I’ve never read fantasy romance before. Do you have any with you I could read?”
“Not with me,” Ryder said, only half paying attention as he skimmed stories.
“We had to bug out in the dark last time and he couldn’t reach his stash,” River answered for him. “You should have heard him bitching about it. I don’t think he’s read anything in weeks. When Ryder and I head out to gather supplies from our other nearby bunkers in a few days, I’ll grab some.”
I could feel my mouth hanging open at their casual conversation while Ryder read my journal. A stifled noise had me glancing at Ava, who was trying to smother a laugh at my predicament. I shot her a glare, but the warm smile and the wink she shot back at me eased my nerves. I could feel her subtly sending me encouragement. Knowing she wanted this, however it happened, had me relaxing.
“Oooh, here’s a spicy bit,” Ryder said, as his voice roughened.“She trailed her hands down his chest, lightly tracing the ridges of his hard muscles until she reached the gathered fabric at his waist. His wings flared behind him as he prepared to take flight. He knew staying would only put them both in unimaginable danger, but every illicit touch made it so much harder to leave. She was a princess, and he was a guardsman in the king’s army. They couldn’t be together. Yet he wavered a moment too long and forgot how to breathe as she reached a hand up and traced the edge of a sensitive wing with a finger. Only mates touched the wings of a warrior. His eyes stuttered closed as ecstasy pulsed through him and his resolve disappeared like mist in the light of day. Her other hand slipped beneath the fabric of his loincloth, and her breath hitched as she stroked the hard length of him. She trembled in his arms-”
“Stop,” I groaned as I flung my head onto the back of the couch and my hand instinctively reached out to clutch at Wolf’s thigh. I desperately tried to anchor myself against the sound of my written words spoken in Ryder’s dark, sexy voice. They had my whole body alight. Each word was a lash of white-hot need.
“Oh, I don’t think I will. It’s just getting interesting,” Ryder said. “Don’t you agree, Wolf?” It was typical of Ryder to try to save me from myself. He always seemed so in tune with how I was feeling and seemed to recognize when I was overthinking. It disarmed me.
Wolf was as still as a statue underneath my hand, his hard thigh like a rock as his body tensed. Yet, with my eyes closed, I could hear him breathing hard in the sudden silence. I felt how much he wanted me, as the wall I’d put up between us cracked at my touch.
