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I can’t make him feel something for me.
But I did get what I wanted out of this.
I’m no longer a virgin.
I was the last of the awesome foursome to succumb, even though they don’t know that. They always assumed I’d slept with previous boyfriends, and I just let them believe it. It was easier that way.
I lie back down on the bed, still naked.
Jesse walks to the bathroom, picking up his shoes on the way. I hear the water running. Then I hear the toilet flush. He emerges from the bathroom fully clothed, his eyes sunken, dark circles still surrounding them.
I didn’t think I could possibly feel worse after his rejection, but I do. I did this to him. He needs sleep, but he’s not going to get any. Now he feels this overwhelming guilt, and that is all my fault.
He’s feeling like he’s the worst person who’s ever lived, but that’s not true.I’mthe worst person who’s ever lived.
I got what I wanted, but now I’ve given us both so much guilt—so much guilt, right as we’re about to embark on a months-long tour together.
A tour that could make or break Jesse’s career.
I gulp. “Jesse…”
“Good night, Brianna.”
He walks out of the bedroom, and I hear the door to the suite close.
“I’m sorry,” I finish.
Then I let the tears come.
I wake up to my phone buzzing. For a moment I don’t know where I am, until I remember…
The ache between my legs reminds me.
Jesse was right. I’m sore.
Where the hell is my phone? Probably in my purse. I dart my gaze around the room and find it sitting on the floor near the door of the bedroom.
It has stopped buzzing by then, and I have a voicemail. From Maddie.
“Oh my God, Brianna, where are you? I woke up and you’re not here. Please call me as soon as you get this. In the meantime, I’m throwing on some clothes, and I’m going to look for you.”
What am I going to tell Maddie? I sure as hell can’t tell her I spent the night in a suite with her brother. That’s not even true. Jesse left in the middle of the night.
But I can’t let her go on being frantic. I call her back.
“Oh my God, Bree!” she gasps into the phone.
“Hi, Mads. I’m okay.”
“Where the heck are you?”
“I…got up early. Came down for coffee.”
“Your bed is still made.”
“I know. I made it.”
She huffs into my ear. “Brianna, why are you lying to me?”
