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No. No. No. Allison growled. The sound echoed off the kitchenwalls. She would not dwell on Colin’s mouth, or his tongue, except to recall every aggravating sentence those two parts of his body had ever produced.
She stabbed her spoon through an oaty O, digging it into the bottom of the bowl for good measure.
Sophie swept into the kitchen as Allison was murdering her second Cheerio. “Oh my god. Is the world ending?” She glanced down at her phone and then back at Allison. Faux surprised creased her face.
“You’re hilarious,” Allison muttered, shoving a heaping spoonful of cereal into her mouth.
“I didn’t think you rose before ten on weekends.”
“If I knew I’d be facing the Spanish Inquisition, I wouldn’t have bothered.”
“No one expects the Spanish Inquisition.”
Allison groaned. “And no one needs Monty Python references at seven in the morning.”
Sophie shot her a satisfied grin as she grabbed an empty bowl and joined Allison at the table. “Look at all I’ve taught you.” She poured milk into the bowl and then added cereal on top (Sophie did nothing the conventional way, no matter how horrifying). “So, for real, what’s with the early rise?”
Allison twirled her spoon through her milk, turning her Cheerios into a whirlpool. Part of her wanted to tell Sophie about her dream, just to speak it out loud. Usually, that stole some of its power. But her best friend considered herself an amateur Freud, and she’d want to interpret its meaning. The last thing Allison needed was to hear Sophie suggest she still had feelings for Colin. And then she’d have to admit why he’d been on her mind, and… nope. There was not enough room in Allison’s tired head for that.
She settled on the other reason she’d had trouble sleeping. “Teaching didn’t go so great.”
Sophie waved a hand. “No way. I bet you’re being too hard on yourself. No one talks about books the way you do. Remember theguy at that bookstore near my house you schooled on the Middle Ages versus the Renaissance—”
“The early modern period,” Allison corrected her.
“Yes. Just like that. They ended up reshelving the whole section. Did I tell you?”
“What?! NO.” Allison barked out a laugh. She’d just learned she’d gotten an A– on a paper she’d worked her ass off on and had been feeling pretty spicy that day. “That’s exactly the kind of confidence boost I need right now.”
Sophie flashed her a grin around her mouthful of Cheerios. “Just think. Soon you’ll be inspiring all your students to rearrange their own book shelves.”
Allison yawned, and the two of them fell into a comfortable silence. With Monty still asleep, the only sound in the kitchen was their quiet chewing. As she ate, Sophie reached across the table to where she’d left her tablet, revealing a small stack of papers half-shoved under the placemat beneath it. The top one was thick, formal paper with Sophie’s credentials listed across the top.
Allison snatched it up, her eyes narrowing. “Why do you have résumés out?” She brandished the paper at Sophie.
Sophie shrugged, her attention on the sketch she was fussing with. “Just giving them a tune-up.”
“I thought you were going to go into business for yourself? You know, do the whole trade show thing, not work with a label? You said you didn’t want to be held back by other people’s visions.”
Sophie’s olive skin reddened. “I’m just keeping my options open. Maybe it’d be nice to work for a big brand someday. Lead designer and all that. Imagine having all those resources behind me.”
“Yeah,someday.” Allison’s knee bounced. She was already rattled, and now her heart had found a new burst of speed. This didn’t sound like a résumé tune-up. This sounded like Sophie was actively looking for a job.
“Brooks told me about a few companies in New York and one in Boston that recently put out calls for designers.”
Brooks. Of course. Whenever Allison hung out with Sophie and her designer friends, he was always bringing up people Allison didn’t know and chortling at their inside jokes. He would be the one encouraging Sophie to apply to jobs whole train rides away.
If Allison and her best friend were growing worlds apart in the same room, what would happen if she moved?
It felt like the floor was dropping out from under her. Pushing out her chair, Allison mumbled, “I should get going. I have an entire, giant Victorian novel to read for class this weekend.”
“Wait.” Sophie caught her wrist. “No matter where we are, we’re always us. You know that, right?” Her dark eyes held Allison hostage. “Besides, I haven’t applied anywhere. I’m just assessing my options.”
“I know.” Allison shook her head. “But I liked our plan. Graduate. Get a place together. Support each other through all the ups and downs as we start our careers and all that.”
“We can still do that, even if we’re not living in the same place.”
She wasn’t wrong. Allison let her head fall back. “Sorry. I’m… having a morning.” She couldn’t let Sophie see how much this news had railroaded her. That would only prove her mother right about Allison’s fear of change.
