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“How did you find out?”
“Parker. He told me Dennis has been researching alpha shit for months. I put two and two together, and I knew something had to be up. When we broke into his computer, we found pictures he’d taken on his phone of the results of one of your physicals, which you’d left on your desk. I guess that’s how he found out.”
“Youbrokeinto his computer?”
She throws up her hands. “Why are you focusing on all the wrong things?”
“SoDennisturned me in?”
“I mean, are you surprised? That weasel has been gunning for your job for forever, right? It’s not that much of a stretch that he’d be the most likely candidate to sabotage you like that.”
“I can’t believe it,” I breathe. “I knew he hated me, but I never thought he’d go snooping through my office like that.”
“What he did was acrime, Noah. We can get him on a HIPAA violation at the very least. Then there’s the blackmailing. We can nail that shithead to the wall.”
“We?”
She pauses, looking unsure for the first time since she came here. “Unless you...” She wrinkles her nose. “Unless you weren’t lying at the café?”
“Mackenzie, I... I really hurt you.”
“You’re damned right you did. Here I am, finally thinking I can try out this whole relationship thing, and you come along with your stupid ‘I don’t know if it’s the right time for us’ bullshit, and if I didn’t think you were doing that because of some nonsense alpha idea of protecting me, then I wouldn’t even be here.” She juts out her chin, staring me down. “Isthat why you did what you did, Noah?”
I could keep up with the lie, even now. There is still a part of me that thinks eventually she would have realized I wasn’t enough, that there are better options for her out there, and maybe a good person would give her that opportunity. Maybe a better person would usher her out the door to make sure nothing bad ever touched her.
But maybe I’m not a better person.
“He threatened your job,” I tell her slowly. “He was going to turn you in for lying to the board.”
“That absolute fuckhead,” Mackenzie hisses. “I’m going to give him a testicular torsion when I see him again.”
“You’re not... mad at me?”
“Oh, I’m mad at you,” she assures me angrily. “You should have told me the truth. We could have figured out a solution together. You should havetrustedme, Noah.”
“I should have,” I echo dumbly, knowing she’s right. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m not some damsel in distress who needs you to save me. This wasmycareer on the line, too, and I deserved a choice here. You took that away from me when you went all alpha male.”
“I know. I know that, but I—”
“This is exactly what I wanted to avoid when you found out what I was. I have never wanted or needed someone to protect me, do you understand? I can do that myself. What I want is someone who is there for me. Even when times are tough.” She blinks, looking surprised. “Fuck. I didn’t even know Iwantedthat until you.”
“Mackenzie, I...” I run my fingers through my hair anxiously. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right, okay? I never wanted to hurt you, you have to believe me on that. It’s just I...” I huff out a breath, struggling for the words. “I’ve never cared about someone like I care about you.”
She blinks in surprise, whatever angry thing that had been on the tip of her tongue falling away. “What?”
“I don’t know when it happened, and I know we wanted to avoid it, but somewhere in the middle of all this fake mate nonsense, I started to haverealfeelings for you. And that terrified me. Not only because your career was suddenly put in jeopardy, but because I knew that one day you would figure out that you deserved a hell of a lot better than me.”
“Better than you,” she parrots slowly.
I nod, looking down at my feet. “I’m older than you, and I’m not very fun, and I’m learning that I’m entirely too possessive, and...Look at you.” I gesture to all of her. “You’re funny, and bright, and everyone loves you. I mean, they call me the damned Boogeyman of Denver General, for fuck’s sake.”
“Noah—” she starts, but I can’t seem to stop talking now.
“The last thing Ieverwanted to do was hurt you, but I knew you would dive in headfirst to fight this thing, and I couldn’t risk you throwing everything away. Not for me. Because you might not regret it today, or tomorrow, but one day... you’d resent me for it. And I would deserve it. It felt like that future would be a lot more painful for you than ending things here. I thought...” I breathe in deep, blowing it out as I finally lift my head to meet her eyes. “I thought it would be easier for you to just forget me before I had the chance to hurt you even more.”
She doesn’t say anything for a long time, the seconds ticking by as we both just stare at each other. I can’t fathom what she might have to say to all that, but I’m preparing myself for the worst.
