AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Like one of the Spartans from300?”
“Mmm, yeah, that’s a good guess, only better looking.”
“Whah? Damn, girl, you’re killing me.”
I laughed. “Sorry?”
“Don’t you dare be sorry. I gotta live vicariously through you.”
I laughed again. “Come on, your hubby is adorable and successful and great to you and the kids.”
“Well, yeah, but he’s not Drew Katterman and a Spartan in my bed.”
That had me laughing even harder.
Holly sighed. “Expect me to ask many questions every time we speak, and I want a picture of your Spartan god, Zelda.”
“I’ll see what I can do.”
“Good. Now why did you really call? I’m sure it wasn’t to rub my nose in your sexcapades.”
“No! No-no-no. Actually, I called about Tina Andreessen’s book.”
“Oh. That.” All the bubble left her voice. “It’s garbage and you want to release it as Stella, right?”
Stella Fairfax was the name I used for work I produced but didn’t want associated with my main portfolio.
“God,please. I’m struggling. This is vying with the geckos for the most agonizing book birth.”
“That bad?”
“Yes. AlmostStickie Fingersbad.”
One of my earliest audiobooks was a paranormal romance about a group of men who could shift into gecko form at will and used their abilities for larceny, of course. It was, well, infamous. Not because I gave a crappy performance. No, I gave that book everything I had, but you can shine a turd as much as you want, and it’ll still be a turd.
Holly took me on, not in spite of that book, but because of it. She said anyone who could make that god-awful tripe palatable, was someone she wanted to represent. “There’s a good story buried somewhere under all the purple prose, I’m just not sure how long it’ll take me to unearth it. Holly, it’s justexhausting.”
“I knew this would be a hard one, that’s why I quoted her five hundred an hour. I thought she’d balk, but she didn’t bat an eyelash.” Holly paused and said, “And I don’t think I can change your credit, hon. She specifically requested Zelda Gordon.”
“She’sgettingZelda Gordon. It’s just that I’m tired of describing every little fucking thing these characters do and see and smell and hear and feel and think. It takes them two pages just to walk across a damned room and even longer to make a decision.”
“Zel. I know she’s not Drew, but not everyone’s writing can be as fun and as good as his.”
“I’m aware of that. It’s just that I’m getting spoiled on his writing, you know?”
“Yes, you are, and you can’t put all your eggs in that basket. That’s not how you build a sustainable career, honey, and it’s not fair to either of you. You need to work with other authors, and he should work with other narrators.”
“I know, I know.” I sighed. “Okay. But don’t do Tina Andreesen to me again. I definitely am not available for the sequel.”
She laughed. “So I gathered. Are you going to miss the deadline?”
“No. I’m right on schedule. It just feels like I’m punching myself in the face when I’m in the booth.”
She fell silent for a moment. “Honey, are you okay?”
I sighed. “Yeah. I had a rough night. Stomach went kablooey and I was up puking.”
“Oh, Zel, I’m sorry. That explains why you sound tired and at your wit’s end.”
