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He’s holding things back from me because he doesn’t think I can deal.
There’s a chance he’s right. A very big chance. It’s my own fault. I’m more than aware of that. But being in the dark is worse than anything he could tell me.
It leaves me here wondering, and my mind loves nothing more than to come up with the worst possible scenarios.
Pushing myself so I’m sitting in bed, I lean forward and rest my elbows on my knees as I look around.
My room doesn’t look like mine.
It’s tidy.
I can see the floor and all the surfaces. The clothes that are still out are folded neatly and everything else has been put away.
It’s wrong. It doesn’t feel like my space.
But then my body doesn’t exactly feel like my own either.
Everything is wrong.
My movements are slower than I’d like, but my willpower to do something is stronger than my desire to remain sitting in bed, allowing my mind to spin.
Too much thinking is how I ended up in this mess in the first place.
I need a distraction. Something else to think about other than the person I really want next to me not being here.
I pause, the pain in my chest as sharp as ever as I think about her slipping out of my bed and disappearing in the middle of the night without a second thought about what she was leaving behind.
My legs are weak, my muscles pulling with the effort it takes to walk to my closet to find some sweats, but I don’t allow my exhaustion to win.
I’ve done nothing but sleep and drown in my own thoughts since I woke up. It’s time for something else. For a different view. To find out what exactly is going on.
Reid said that Victor knows and that we’re about to find out if everything we’ve been planning is going to be enough to wipe him and his little fucked-up posse from the face of the Earth. But that’s all I know. And it’s nowhere near enough.
Pulling my sweats up my legs takes more effort that it should, and by the time I’m at the door, ready to make my escape from the room that has been nothing but a prison cell for the past few days, my chest is heaving with exertion, and I’ve got a bead of sweat on my brow.
I’m not exactly in the kind of state I’d like to embark on a war, but I guess it’s too late to worry about that now.
The house is silent as I slowly descend the stairs, but I know that Reid isn’t far away.
It’s been impossible to miss the guilt swimming in his eyes every time he’s looked at me since I woke up.
He thinks all of this is his fault, that if he’d have woken me and explained then it would have stopped me.
Would it have?
Honestly, I’m not sure.
She’s still not here and he’s still keeping secrets.
The only difference is that I haven’t had a choice in taking my meds.
With a pained sigh, I scratch at the bandage wrapped around my arm as I take the last few steps.
I’ve only made it a couple more when the deep rumble of voices floats through the air.
Diverting away from the kitchen, I move closer to Reid’s office.
Lifting my hand, I’m about to push the door open to announce my presence when the sound of my best friend’s angry voice, quickly followed by a loud bang, gives me pause.
