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I lost every ounce of control tonight, crossing a line I never thought I would. And the sound of her moans on repeat, like a broken record, only has me wanting to do it all over again.?
Except I seem to be the only one concerned about coming out on the other side, unphased…or worse, unwanted.
Nine
“Do y’all ever get tired of these parties?” Ford questions from where he sits on his motorcycle. He’s staring out at the field where hundreds of our classmates are currently having the time of their lives celebrating Thanksgiving break.?
“The real question is, do you?” Greyson asks from beside me on the tailgate of his old truck.?
Ford’s far-off expression stays in place for a few more seconds before he turns his head to us with a big smile in place. “Ha…true. And nah, it will never get old. I’m just ready for the real partying at the clubhouse.” He raises his eyebrows in emphasis, trying to hide his true emotions in typical Ford fashion.?
It’s never been a secret that Ford plans to follow in Smith’s and Gunnar’s footsteps. His main goal in life is to become a Rebel Knight, and I don’t fault him. I know they’ve given him the family he never really had. But I call bullshit… I think something heavier has been weighing on him lately. Even as good as we know him, he doesn’t do feelings, so there is no use in trying to get him to open up about it. He’ll shut down quicker than you can laugh at the dumb joke he tells to avoid the serious conversation.??
“Well, y’all know the only reason I come to these fucking parties is because of you guys.”?
“You sure it has nothing to do with the hottie dancing with Greyson’s girl right now?”?
I don’t even have to look, because I know exactly where she is any time we’re in the same place.?
My brain fires off excuses that I’m used to spitting out when Ford taunts me over Emerson, but I know there’s no use in denying it. Nobody knows me better than these two.?
“Fuck… probably.” I pull on my hair. “I can’t even lie to myself anymore… What’s the use.”?
“Thank fuck.” Ford starts a slow clap.?
“Smartass,” I grumble, unable to hold back the smile on my face when I see the excited look on both of my best friends’ faces.?
G slaps a hand on my shoulder. “From one pussy-whipped brother to another…get ready to not be able to walk, talk, sleep, eat, fight without her on your mind. It's the sweetest fucking torture.”?
Shit, she’s already on my mind constantly.From sunup to sundown.?
“Have you told her?” Ford asks, and I debate how much to tell. I trust them with my life, but I don’t know if she would appreciate her business out there like that.?
“Oh hell... Y’all fucked, didn’t you?” Ford asks with the cheesiest grin on his face.?
“No… but close.” I look out to where she’s having fun dancing with the girls. I haven’t seen her glance in my direction once tonight. “I just don’t think we want the same thing.”?
“Well, you’ll never know unless you talk to her about it,” Greyson says, and he’s right.?
“Yeah, I know.”?
“I feel like she’s always watched you a second longer than anyone else.”?
“I didn’t even know you paid attention to shit like that.” I chuckle in response to Ford’s observation.?
“I’m more observant than you both give me credit for. And I know for a fact she’ll be ringside next month at your first big fight. She’d never miss that.”?
“I still can’t believe Gunnar got me on the card in Charlotte. Fucking surreal.”?
“It’s only up from here,” Ford says, getting off his bike.?
“I won’t miss this one.” Greyson hops down, standing beside me as we follow Ford toward the crowd. He wasn’t at the underground fight because he and Lottie went to her house in Nori Beach that weekend.?
“Don’t say anything tonight. You two are the only people besides Gunnar who know. I haven’t had the chance to tell Emerson or my brother yet.”?
Ford turns back toward me. “Don’t you think Gun would have told Frankie?”?
I shake my head. “I asked him not to tell anyone.”?
