AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I throw the last of the empty jerry cans to the side and observe my reflection in the front picture window, the setting sun at my back. The panels on either side of the large pane are open, and the gasoline fumes permeate the air. I bought this house three years after I joined the Z.E.R.O. unit because I hated living in a rental. I purchased it right before I asked Natalie to marry me. It was just a dull brick-and-mortar thing, but it was the only place that felt like home to me after a very long time. And now, it’s returned to being nothing more than a pile of brick and mortar again.
Pulling the lighter out of my pocket, I flick the wheel, sparking the flame, and throw it through the open window. The lighter lands on the gasoline-saturated furniture, igniting the fire, and by the time I reach my car, the blaze is already consuming the curtains.
Once I’m behind the wheel, I reach for the old metal box on the passenger seat. Atop the pile of passports and other IDs lies a silver bracelet charm of a teddy bear with a pink bow that I bought for Natalie years ago with the money I stole during one of my jobs. She was obsessed with bears of any kind, probably because they reminded her of the carefree childhood she had before she ended up on the streets. I don’t think I ever saw her without that silly charm. The hospital staff removed the bracelet when they took her to surgery, and the chain got lost along the way. Only the teddy bear charm was included with her belongings when they were returned to me.
My eyes shift to the key chain hanging on the rearview mirror. A shiny pendant of a poker hand—a royal flush no less. The metal clasp attaching the pendant to the ring broke long ago, so now it’s just secured with a leather string. My dad gave me that thing after I beat him at poker the very first time, and I’ve kept it all these years to remind me of him and one of his other lessons: Don’t just accept the hand you’ve been dealt in life. Sometimes, you need to be the dealer.
I take the key chain off the mirror and remove the pendant from the string, throwing it into the metal box. Holding the teddy bear charm in one hand, I thread the leather through the loop at the top, then tie the string around my wrist.
When I look up toward the house, the fire is already eating at its sides. I lean back in the driver’s seat and watch the flames annihilate what was once my home, as well as the last fragments of my soul.
I was never a good man. The first time I took a life, I was barely sixteen. It was in self-defense, but it doesn’t change the fact. When you live on the streets, in the worst part of the city, it’s either kill or be killed. Survival.
Not much humanity was left in me by the time I met Natalie, but having her by my side helped save those pitiful remnants. She became my purpose. The only thing that kept my heart from becoming an unbreachable cold rock.
I never told her the truth about my “work,” fearing that she’d get scared of me. Natalie believed I was a security guard at a military installation and never knew she was living with a killer. Sometimes, I wanted to confide in her, to tell her about some of my missions, but I didn’t think she would be able to handle it, so I kept my mouth shut. Having her with me was enough.
But she’s gone now, and she took everything good with her. Hope. Dreams. Love. The only things left are agony and rage. From this fury within, a bloodthirsty, feral beast rises, asking for retribution. Blood. Death.
I don’t give a fuck if what happened to my wife was an accident. Don’t care if it was a high-as-kite kid or someone’s grandfather with failing eyesight who was driving the car that hit her. I’m going to find them. And they will pay.
I take the stack of documents from the metal box and start leafing through them, looking at different names on each. Multiple identities are a necessity when your job description includes killing people for a living. My hand stops on the last ID, a name I haven’t used for almost a decade. Alessandro Zanetti. Kruger kept pestering me about my real name for months, but I never caved, even after he had his men break my arm, and he finally dropped the subject. He had no use for a soldier who couldn’t go on missions because he was too roughed up, and all recruits used fake names and IDs anyway. I’m not sure why I was so stubborn about it. Maybe because my name was the only thing I truly owned at that time. Or it could have been because I simply enjoyed pissing Kruger off.
Grabbing the stack of fake IDs and passports, including the documents I got last week, I throw them out of the window. It seems fitting to use my real name when I kill the bastard responsible for my wife’s death.
By the time I put the car in reverse and pull out of the driveway, the flames have already reached the roof, turning my home into ash.
Four months ago
The rain is relentless, drenching my already wet jacket and plastering my hair to my face. I forgot my umbrella at work, too shocked by the news that the diner where I work will be closing next week. That leaves me with only my part-time job at an accounting firm, which isn’t enough, and I’ll need to start looking for something else right away.
I’m trying to move one of the wet strands out of my eyes when a truck zooms by me on my left, racing down the empty but puddle-covered street and splashing me with the dirty curb water. A sigh of defeat leaves my lips as I stop in the middle of the deserted sidewalk and look at my new white sneakers which are now soaked and stained in muck.
Even though I’m still being pelted by the torrential rain, I can’t look away from my shoes. Yesterday, I felt a little guilty because money is tight this month, but I was so excited when I left the store after purchasing my runners. If I knew that I’d be losing my job today, I never would have bought them.
The blaring of a car horn pulls me away from my thoughts, and I look up to see Melania, my best friend since high school, waving at me from the driver’s window of her car.
“Jesus, Ravi!” she yells. “Get in!”
I rush toward her vehicle and open the passenger door, but when my eyes fall on the nice interior and the dry seat I just shake my head. “I’m all muddy.”
“Oh, for God’s sake. Just get in, Ravenna.” Melania leans toward me and grabs my hand, pulling me inside.
“Late shift?” I ask as I put on the seat belt. Melania works at a pharmacy just down the street.
“Yeah. I should have been done by midnight, but we had some deliveries that came in late, so I had to sort that out. We got that pain balm you asked about for Mamma Lola.”
I nod. Considering the situation, I’m not sure we can afford it at the moment.
“I saw Vitto when I was heading to work this afternoon,” she continues as she pulls back onto the street. “He was with Ugo.”
“I told him that I don’t want him hanging out with that kid, but he won’t listen. That dude is a bad influence.”
“Are they stealing again?”
I lean back on the headrest and close my eyes. My brother has been extremely difficult over the past year. “I hope not. The grocery store manager said he’ll file a police report if he catches them again.”
“Maybe you could try to find him a job for the summer. I can ask around if you want?”
