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His lips are softer than they look, and they feel good pressed hard against mine. When his tongue massages against my own, I lose all train of thought, losing myself in the kiss.
This is the kiss my mum would tell me about when I was younger. The one you’ll only experience once in a lifetime. It’s your forever kiss, the kiss that makes you feel like you’re floating in air and bathed in sunlight. It makes you feel like a thousand butterflies are fluttering inside your belly and gives you a sense of safety that you’ll never feel with anyone else.
It’s that kiss and more.
Much more!
It’s Cole.
My fallen angel.
My saviour.
My friend.
My arms tighten around him, pulling him closer, and when he breaks the kiss, a part of my body’s reaction is to move with him, hating the separation he puts between us.
His husky chuckle has me snapping my gaze to him. Lust and desire stare back at me.
“Are you with me?” he asks. His sudden question not only startles me, but confuses me. It’s not until I read behind his words that I fully understand. I melt under him. I’ve never known anyone to be as considerate as he is when it comes to people’s feelings, especially mine. He’s worried I’m going to freak out.
“Always,” I whisper, and watch as his eyes change once again, a soft expression flashing in them.
He doesn’t make me wait another second. His lips bear down on mine, kissing me softly and thoroughly, making all my dreams come true.
CHAPTER TWENTY
A few weeks have passed since I blacked out at the rugby field. I feel more embarrassed than anything, especially knowing who watched me fall.
Today, I finally get to see my munchkin, Mia, and get a break from everyone’s scrutiny. I know they’re extra worried about me because of my attack and the blackout, but I haven’t had one since. I’ve told them countless times to relax. If anything, I just feel on edge, wanting to get everything sorted so we can take them down.
We’re actually one more step closer towards achieving that goal. We’re meeting at the library in a couple of days to go over everything.
The only thing that is stopping me from breaking and entering to get that damn chest myself, is Cole. He’s become a constant in my life, and a welcome one at that. Since we kissed a few weeks ago, things have changed dramatically between us, and the heat that was there before is now a furnace, sizzling, bubbling, and ready to explode.
His kisses are like magic, and I am happy being under his spell. They take me away from the nightmare going on around me. He makes everything disappear. More than that, my feelings for him run deep. He also makes me feel something I never thought I would again.
Sexy!
As cheesy at it sounds, he makes me feel like I’m one of a kind, special and loved.
Since the rape, I’ve done nothing but see my body as rot. Dirt and fungi at its finest. I’ve tried my hardest to scrub myself clean of the bacteria rotting my body, but nothing seems to work. I’ve kept these feelings to myself, not wanting to worry anyone when I knew none of them could help.
Nothing could.
Well, nothing worked until I felt what it was like to be in Cole’s arms. To be touched by him and to feel his lips press softly against mine. It killed me to pull away from him the first time he kissed me, but he didn’t disappoint me when he came back for more. He didn’t look at me with disgust or pity, but with lust, desire, and another emotion I couldn’t quite put my finger on. It was as strong as all the other emotions shining back at me in the pools of his deep blue eyes. It made me breathless.
He’s continued to kiss me, to breathe me in. He hasn’t rushed me or tried to push for more since then. In fact, he seems content with keeping the pace slow. I’m happy with the pace he’s set since I don’t know what will happen if he ever does try to take it further.
I’ll never remember the night I was raped, not fully, even if my body does. I just don’t want to push my body towards something it’s not ready for, even if a part of my mind is.
He’s been my rock, along with Allie and CJ at school. The first day I went back after breaking down in class was hard. My anxiety spiked to extreme levels, and I got so paranoid, especially when someone would look my way. People still stare, some with judgement clouding their eyes, some with sympathy. It helped that when I walked into class Monday morning, Becca was sitting in the front row, nice and early. CJ let Becca have his chair so she could sit next to me. He took the chair on the other side of Cole. When the lad who usually occupied the seat showed up, you could see he wanted to argue and demand that CJ move. Then he took a second look at CJ and Cole, and rushed off to take Becca’s old seat. He moved so fast it was comical.
It was also then that Professor Moby informed me I could have an extension on my assignment, one I didn’t want or ask for. I want to show him and myself that I can work under pressure. But now, sitting in Jackie’s front room, I’m beginning to wonder what the hell I was thinking declining his offer. A headache is forming from trying to think of a topic to write about.
“You’re breathing funny again,” Mia grumbles, scrunching her nose up.
Ever since I arrived, she’s been really attentive, and watching closely, as if she’s waiting for me to sprout wings or horns. Not even her tablet has kept her occupied. When I asked why she kept staring and asking questions, she told me her mum had told her I had been ill too, and that I had a nasty fall. I’m just glad my bruises have gone. The ones that linger are covered by makeup.
