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“Cee. If I could stay home, I would.”
“Well, I can, and I plan to.” She crossed her arms over her chest.
I shook my head at her. “Just a couple weeks. When we break for Thanksgiving, if you’re still not feeling it, you can stay home then. You don’t ever have to leave the bus.”
“I’m not going!” she stood and yelled at me.
I scrubbed my hands over my face. “I’m afraid I’m not taking ‘no’ for an answer, Kate.”
“You don’t get to call me that when you’re being an asshole.” She squinted her eyes at me with her ire.
“Fine. Catherine, you’ll be coming on tour. Pack some shit.” If being an asshole was how I got her on the bus, then so be it. I stood to leave the room, allowing her some space to cool off.
“Who the hell do you think you are?” she spat at my back.
“Your shadow for the foreseeable future. And as you know, I suck at packing my own shit, so if I were you, I wouldn’t leave that to me.”
I heard her throw something at the wall as she screamed, “Fuck you, Sergio!”
Yeah. This was going to be a disaster. I hope you know what you’re doing, Elle.
Thirty-Eight
There were arguments about sleeping arrangements on the buses. Mish, Connor, Silas, and Elle had planned to be on the same bus, along with some support staff. Tom, Matteo, and I were taking the second bus with more of the support staff.
The argument came about when Elle and I were fighting over which bus Cee should stay on. Mish and Elle wanted to keep tabs on Cee, but I didn’t think them rubbing their happy relationships in Cee’s face was a great idea. Better for her to be on the bus with the sexually frustrated and lonely people.
Plus, I didn’t trust that they would watch her as closely as I would.
Since Cee saw this trip as my fault and was mad at me, she went to stay on the other bus. I should’ve been relieved not to be on babysitting duty, but it made me uneasy. She still seemed so fragile even though she was no more pissed than completely distraught.
After an eight-hour trip to our first city, we got off the buses for some radio interviews. The guys and I had received our customary morning voicemail from Cee, which I wasn’t expecting. She sounded chipper as she told us where we were, what major plans we had for the day, and the status of ‘the shirt’, which thankfully was accounted for.
Maybe I was wrong. Maybe she needed this.
Elle and I had maintained an icy demeanor toward each other since the day she insisted we were dragging Cee along on this trip, so she had Silas keeping track of me. I felt bizarre opening for another band after spending so much time being the headliner, but I fell into the routine pretty easily. I didn’t really need a babysitter, but apparently Elle found it necessary. She has control issues, and it was her first tour as our manager.
I didn’t see Cee until just before they slated for us to go on stage. She was in the back room drinking with some roadies, but it looked like she was having a good time. She ignored me, but I was fine with being the bad guy here. As long as she wasn’t sobbing in her bed, refusing to eat, things were looking up.
Midway through our set, I caught her out of the corner of my eye on the side of the stage. She looked so sad I missed a few beats, garnering me a look from Connor. I refocused to finish out the set, but as soon as it was over, I went searching for her.
I could hear Connor calling my name from behind me, but I had a one-track mind. “Where is she?” I asked Mish.
“She’s fine. She said she was tired and went back to the bus.”
“She’s not fine, Mish, she was crying.”
“Is that why you were fucking up?” Connor interrupted, now at my side.
Mish ignored the comment. “She’s gonna cry, Serge. She just lost her boyfriend. You’ve got to focus on your job before Connor and Elle cut you.” She rubbed a hand up and down my arm, trying to calm me down.
I sighed. “Yeah. She just… looked so fucking sad.”
“Because she is. But she’ll be okay. I sent security to make sure she made it to the bus and no one unauthorized followed her.”
“We have to get out front to meet people. Then you and I need to chat,” Connor said.
I played nice with fans, introducing them to our new band and, generally, just acting like myself, but I didn’t feel like myself. I felt incomplete, as if I had forgotten to do something important.
