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The true personality that I had hidden so well that I was not even aware that it existed.
The last few feet lay above me, and contrary to my first guess at the beginning of the trail, I now knew for sure that I would make it. Had it taken me half an eternity to get there, was I dripping with sweat and feeling like I had been run over by a truck? Yes, all of it. But I did it because I believed in myself.
And anyone who saw it as anything other than success simply had no place in my life.
The days of being patronized or having someone else determine my life were finally over. No one but me would determine me anymore.
Maybe Lei when we were both naked and taking great pleasure in him whispering in my ear what would happen next or what I should do to get what we both wanted– pleasure and excitement, not iron control enforced with terror and fear.
By the time I reached the edge, my hands were bloody and my knees were bruised, but pulling myself over the edge and sinking into the grassy strip was the best feeling to rush through my body on this trip.
I crawled to the edge and looked down with a grin.
"Where are you?" I called to him. The next thing I knew, he climbed up the cliff without any gear, as if it was the easiest thing in the world and danger could not touch him.
Audrey
8 WEEKS LATER
Ihad believed that this year would be the first birthday I didn't hate, simply because I wasn't spending it at my parents' house, but with the message that had lit up on my display early that morning, that notion was gone for good.
My suspicion was confirmed as I stood in front of the pompously set table in my parents' dining room and felt my mother's appraising gaze on me. Lei didn't miss his cue, because he grabbed the chair and pulled it out from under the table so I could sit.
"Is it really necessary for Lei to be here? We're celebrating your birthday on a small scale," my mother began.
There were four place settings on the table, enough for my parents, Lei, and me. Irritated, I looked up at her. "You don't really understand why he's here, do you? I wouldn't have come alone."
This was not a lie. I needed the security Lei gave me. On the one hand, to suppress the need to bite my nails from stress, and on the other hand, because I didn't feel able to face the chaos unfolding in front of me on my own.
There was still no sign of my father, but surely he would not be long in coming.
"But you could have brought one of your friends if you didn't feel comfortable alone," she continued.
I smiled. "Don't worry, Lei was the perfect choice."
I was still biting my tongue not to say what was really on my mind. My birthday would not be in this place. I longed for the real plans we had– and had to push back so I could try to restore peace in the family. After several months, it was about time.
Lei had not yet taken his seat. Instead, he stood next to me, one hand on the back of the chair, as if he was just there to make sure nothing happened to me.
"Then... cake. Shall I have a small piece brought to you?" She turned to me again.
Small? I looked at the cake on the table, which could hardly be surpassed in its opulence. But apparently it was not available for me to choose from.
"Thanks, I'll manage," I replied and watched with satisfaction as Lei grabbed the knife and my plate to serve me the biggest piece of cake I'd ever seen.
He always knew how to make me happy with such a simple gesture. Only after he had put a piece on his own plate did he sit down next to me.
"So when is Matt joining us?"
"Any minute." My mother looked nervous, and I wasn't sure if it was because she didn't seem to be able to tell me what to do anymore, or for some other reason.
As if she had conjured it up, I heard voices in the hallway. Not a second later, my father entered the room. Alexander in tow.
The fourth plate was for him. And now Lei was sitting in his place. I had a hard time suppressing my grin. Lei's hand suddenly rested on my thigh under the table, admonishing me to keep my composure.
Instead of getting up, I grabbed the fork next to my plate. "Happy birthday to me! Don't bother with congratulations or singing."
In any case, no one would come close to the gift Lei had given me tonight. In addition to a few orgasms, he had taken the liberty of giving me a huge bouquet of flowers, along with a filigree gold ankle bracelet, and the original edition of my favorite book, which he had read to me while I had not only stained my fingers with the powdered sugar from themalasadas.
