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“I’ve said the words, Lara.”
“You care for no one but the Bratva, and you shall love none other than the Bratva.” She repeats those same accursed words to herself. “Rurik said them too. Yet he still makes time for me.He still has room in his heart for love.” Sadness passes over her face and she sets her drink down. “Each day, you become less and less like the Kolya I remember. And more like …” she looks away, blinking back the tears. “Him.”
“Who?” I ask. “Father?”
“No.” she shakes her head. “Matvei.”
“He’s gone because of me, Lara,” I whisper, the pang of guilt crushing my lungs like a vise.Just like Mother,I think bitterly, but dare not say those words to Larissa.
But the look she gives me tells me that she knows. She knows me too well for me to keep my thoughts a secret from her.
“You can’t change the past,” she reminds me as she takes my hand like she did when we were still children. “And you don’t need our brother’s ghost to haunt you anymore.”
“No,” I agree. “I don’t.”
But she’s wrong.
It’s not Matvei’s ghost that haunts me.
It’s all the rest.
20
EDEN
Sleepand I are in a long-distance relationship. I stagger into the ensuite, exhausted, and look at the dark circles under my eyes. I don’t have any concealer, so I splash my face with cold water until it hurts like razors. I don’t want Nikolai to think he’s getting to me.
I can deal with what he said, but what Dominika said? That scares the shit out of me. It’s enough that I know I won’t try running again. A part of me wants to imagine that she’s just doing what she’s supposed to do to keep me here. But if my meeting with those three brigadiers is any indication, there’s a kernel of truth to her words.
And that’s more than enough.
So, I’ll have to be patient and wait for my chance. A good chance, completely foolproof, one that I can’t possibly mess up.
I slowly walk down the spiral steps in search of coffee.
I enter the living room, where a statuesque woman sits beside Nikolai. Her dark hair and eyes are mesmerizing, and the dressshe has on is amazing—its sheer silk material screams summer. But her dress isn’t what draws my eye.
It’s the fact that she’s holding his hand.
Unexpected jealousy rushes to my face and I feel anger welling up inside me. His ring is heavy on my finger, fresh from the forced proposal. Yet here he is already, holding hands with another woman.
And there is something in his eyes when he looks at her, something that I’ve never seen whenever he looks at me. He’s looking at her like he cares. Suddenly, I feel likeI’mintruding into something I’m not supposed to.
That woman certainly looks like his type—she looks like she belongs in this museum gallery of a home.
And try as I might, I cannot help feeling the tears stinging my nose. Even without trying, he manages to humiliate me. To hurt me.
I turn to hurry back upstairs in my stupid borrowed dress and Orphan Annie hair, not wishing to subject myself any further to his games.
But I slip on the step and let out a cry of surprise.
Nikolai turns when he hears me and a smile curls on his lips toward me. If he thinks that I’m supposed to be reassured by it, he’s mistaken. That lopsided smile has me seething with rage.Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!My eyes dart between him and that woman. Back and forth. Back and forth. And I wonder who she is.
“Eden,” he speaks, his voice filled with strange pride. “Come and meet my sister, Larissa.”
Sister?
I blink stupidly as the word registers in my mind. Somehow, I can’t imagine Nikolai having a family. As far as I’m concerned, he might as well have emerged fully formed, like one of those gargoyles on the roof and not from a mother.
