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‘He told me when I shared that I live with Caleb. Although, I would have preferred to hear it from you.’
‘That stalker has known you live with Caleb for weeks. In fact, I have it on good authority that he told Caleb he was going to crack on to you in Zambia.’
‘Piers’s behaviour isn’t my grievance. You not telling me about the pool is, Lara. You’re supposed to be my friend.’ I unfairly feel more annoyed with Lara than I am with Caleb and Piers.
‘I didn’t tell you because it was just another stupid thing tossed around at the office drinks that you didn’t need to know about and were guaranteed to miss anyway, because you refuse to engage in any universe you’re not the centre of. Maybe you would’ve found out earlier if you’d told me you moved in with Caleb. Any particular reason why you didn’t tell me, your supposed friend? I suppose it’s just another thing you hide.’ Lara raises her voice accusingly. ‘I assumed Caleb started the pool because he was bored and found out you’d broken up with Jasper. Of all the fucking people you could’ve moved in with, Ariella, and then you don’t tell me for weeks! Even Nicole found out before me. FuckingNicole!’
Lara and I are having our first fight and I don’t need it. Right now, I am in an uncomfortable place with Jasper, Zachary, Nicole, Piers, Caleb…and now Lara. The bodies keep piling up.
‘I’m full.’ I stand, leaving four ten-pound notes on the table.
‘Ariella Mason, if you walk away from me right now, our friendship is over,’ she threatens.
‘I believe you just made a case for an absence of friendship, Lara.’
The energy of my fight with Lara stays with me until I reach the safety of my desk, where I compose myself by tapping into my breathing exercises to refocus. When I’m finally calm, I open my eyes to see Piers standing over me, smiling. This is not going to end well.
Thankfully,because it’s Wednesday Caleb will be home late, so I get the flat to myself for a few hours. I indulge in a long shower, followed by an ice-cold glass of Chablis while I finish cooking a creamy truffle tagliatelle. Caleb, however, unexpectedly turns up early, just as I am grating some truffle on my pasta.
‘Aren’t you meant to be at Muay Thai?’ I sound more abrasive than I intend to.
‘Hello to you too. I cancelled the class. I needed to talk to you.’
He approaches for a hug. Oh no. I duck under his arm and walk to the other side of the island. I clock the surprise on his face out of the corner of my eye. I know I’ve just been hurtful, but I am hurt too.
‘Any of that going?’ He nods at my food.
‘In the oven. I made yours with cavatappi and truffle butter, because I thought you’d be back late.’
He makes his way to the oven to find his pasta bubbling away. He grabs a bowl, scoops some in, and takes the stool next to mine. I am contemplating taking my food into my room when he speaks.
‘I’m sorry about the pool. It was a ridiculous conversation at the drinks with a couple of guys from the team. Maybe five people knew about it. I honestly didn’t take it seriously. People mentioned a few quid in bets and timelines, but nothing was written down. To be honest, I’d forgotten about it by my third pint. It was a shitty thing to do.’
I’m just going to come out with it.
‘Caleb, I don’t think we should sleep together any more. We should put this weekend down to, I don’t know, getting it out of our systems. Now it’s done, it’s done, y’know?’
A response comes back quicker than I thought it would.
‘If that’s what you want, consider it done.’
‘I’m sorry.’
‘Don’t be. We had fun.’ Caleb just carries on eating, unbothered.
‘Thank you for ending the pool.’
‘It was stupid.’
We eat in silence and I feel a great loss because this isn’t what our evenings look like; they’re normally chatty and fun. I make the effort to lighten things up a little.
‘I ended myfriendshipwith Piers today.’
This will, for sure, have him pressing for the details. Caleb likes a good gossipy story. I wait for it. But all I get is, ‘He’ll get over it. Are you done?’
I look at my bowl of half-eaten pasta and nod. He clears it from in front of me, then starts washing up. The emptiness I feel quietly watching him is hard to bear, but we need to do this. When he’s finished, he grabs his gym bag and heads into his room.
All of a sudden, I feel alone. I’m used to being by myself, but this is different; everything feels out of kilter. I step into my bathroom and have my second shower of the evening. I feel better, and I know what to do now. While the feeling is still there, I get dressed and knock on Caleb’s bedroom door.
