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‘Then you can do it on your own. If you change your mind, let me know.’ She stands before she continues, ‘Stay for breakfast. You shouldn’t go home while you’re feeling like this.’
Ariella doesn’t return from her day out with Jasper until midnight, and I can’t help my relief when I see that she’s alone.
‘Hi.’ She stops when she spots me at the island.
‘Hi. How was it?’
‘Okay.’
She looks at me with uncertainty. I deserve it, so I try to reconnect.
‘You don’t have to be so awkward. Seriously, how did it go?’
‘I don’t want to fight, Caleb.’
‘I don’t want to fight either. I’m just asking how it went.’
‘It was fine. I shouldn’t be talking about Jasper with you anyway.’
‘Why not?’
I know, I am an idiot, but I have nothing else. She maintains a neutral expression and ignores the question.
‘I’m sorry for bringing Jasper home without telling you yesterday. I know that you’re still infuriated about what he said at lunch, I won’t ask him over again.’ Wait, she’s apologising?
‘You did nothing wrong, Aari. My behaviour last night was appalling, and I should be apologising.’
‘It’s okay,’ she responds automatically and turns towards her room.
Her wall is up. I reach out, grab her hand and pull her back.
‘You’re not going to do that. Tell me it’s not okay.’
‘It’s fine, seriously.’
Her eyes don’t meet mine.
‘It’s not fine, Aari. Tell me that I scared you. That I threatened you. That I betrayed you. That you don’t trust me any more.’
A single tear falls and I pull her in to me.
‘The way I behaved last night was inexcusable and you didn’t deserve it. I know you’re not going to believe this, but I promise I’ll never do that to you again. I’ll even be nice about Jasper.’
The first sob escapes, then she breaks down in my arms and I hold her while she cries. I don’t think I can feel any worse. I hold her until she’s got it all out and gently extracts herself from me.
‘Can I make you some tea?’
She nods. ‘I’ll just go and wash my face.’
I pop the kettle on as I wait for her, praying I don’t screw this up. By the time she returns, her tea is ready and steaming next to my coffee.
‘I won’t be an arsehole. How did it go?’
‘I had a good day.’ She smiles but looks unsure.
‘But…’ I ask gently, trying not to rock the boat.
‘Something’s missing.’
