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‘I get spooked when you come home late at night and I hear voices that I don’t recognise. It would be helpful if you just knocked or even called out that it was you. It also freaks me out a bit when there’s a stranger in the kitchen at breakfast almost every morning. I know it’s to be expected, but it’d be nice if they didn’t help themselves to my grapefruit. Perhaps I can add some pastry and breakfast bits to the grocery delivery for your…guests. I also wish you wouldn’t leave the front door unlocked when you leave me at home alone at night. I just want to feel safe here.’
He is nodding along.
‘…And I know it’s your life and you choose how to live it, but can you avoid girls with boyfriends, please? I think you had a lucky escape tonight.’
A smile makes its way across his face. Really?!
‘Okay, I have a responsibility to keep you safe. I’ve got it. Good to know you’re not judging.’
‘Oh, I am, silently; but if you want to get STDd up to your eyeballs, it’s up to you. Thankfully, I don’t have to share a bathroom with you.’
He laughs. ‘You’re a bit uptight, aren’t you?’
‘I’m not uptight, I just want to feel safe. I have enough to worry about right now.’
He pokes my rib so quickly, I am too slow to stop him.
‘Like what?’
‘Stuff.’
‘What kind of stuff? You’re pretty glum all the time.’
‘I’m sorry I’m not entertaining enough for you.’
‘Oh no, I find you immensely entertaining. I said you were glum. You’re obviously hiding from something and it would be good to know what.’
‘It’s none of your business,’ I say, trying to sound casual.
‘It actuallyismy business. While we’re talking safety, you could be running from a particularly motivated stalker who might find out where you live and turn up. So, I need to know why you’re here, because I need to be able to handle it.’
‘You just locked yourself in your room and left me to handle someone’s weapon-wielding boyfriend by myself. I think I’ll be fine.’
‘That’s not fair. I didn’t know he had that. I would’ve been out here like a shot. I have to say, though, that I’m impressed with the way you handled yourself. You’re a lot tougher than you let on. But if you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine. Just thought you could use someone in your corner.’
I really don’t want to tell him, but then I hear the words come out of my mouth. ‘I broke up with my boyfriend.’
He looks at me surprised, then his face contorts and, unexpectedly, he bursts out laughing. Great.
‘What are you? Twelve years old?’
‘You couldn’t possibly understand.’
‘What’s there to understand? You broke up. Big deal. What are you so depressed about? You should be out celebrating your escape!’
I let my irritation show. ‘I’m not promiscuous, unlike some.’
He laughs even harder. ‘Do you think he’s at home, moping about, thinking of you?’
‘I don’t know—’
He interrupts. ‘Definitely not, and now that he’s out of the relationship it’s no longer cheating.’
‘He didn’t cheat.’
‘Really? So why did he end it?’
‘He didn’t end it.’
