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And if Slyth or Zalith knew why I did it, they’d probably help me bury his body. But I cannot lose a soldier now.
Especially not an able-bodied, excellent strategist like Selliss. Not when I am quite certain that a war is coming. As a Lieutenant, there may be men who trust him more than they trust me, and I can’t cause dissension now.
I will need him, if I want to protect Lodra.
But I cannot let anyone know about Krista. None of the soldiers under my command will respect me any longer.
She will be in danger, and my position as captain of the royal guard will be challenged immediately.
Selliss is smiling a smug smile, and he shrugs at me before he leaves.
I go back to my desk, and I let out a breath that has been constricting my breathing since Selliss began speaking.
I know what I need to do now. I will need to hide everything about my relationship with Krista.
I cannot even let the servants know about us any longer.
It will mean no more dinners, and no long walks to the library. It will mean that I will not be able to visit her at the smithy.
The thought of erasing Krista’s existence from my life leaves a sour taste in my mouth, but I do not know what else I could possibly do.
The words I first thought when I first saw Krista come to mind again.
There she is.
I finally found someone who suits me the way Aurora suits Zalith, and the way Lorelai suits Slyth.
And now I have to pretend like I do not know her, when in reality, she has grown to mean everything to me.
But it cannot be helped.
My position in the palace cannot be challenged now, not when we’re on the brink of war.
No harm will come to Krista. Not if I have anything to do with it.
My thoughts are tumultuous, and I am not really thinking straight. But I do know one thing, I’ll protect Krista as much as possible.
No other naga will get their hands on her.
Not in this lifetime.
I go over to the window then, and stare out of it at the smithy.
Krista is standing outside, and I swallow at the sight of her lean frame and her long blonde hair that falls to the middle of her back.
There she is. Mine. The one who has given herself to me. The first woman I have ever cared for.
And I know that this plan of mine, the plan to hide her, the plan to protect her, will hurt her.
And I just hope that she will accept it.
I go back to my desk and open one of the letters that has just arrived.
I try to formulate a response, but all I can think of is Krista and the situation we’re in.
I realize then that, for the first time in my life, my confidence has been challenged.
And I am not sure how I’ll get it back.
