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“I want you to be mine, only mine,” I say and watch his jaws clench harder and harder; his body is slowly easing off mine, and eventually, I can move again. Feeling utterly cold and empty without his mountain of a body pressed up to me.
Just as I predicted, my words have pushed Landon away. But I had to say it.
That’s what I want. I want a relationship, and he isn’t capable of one based on his whoring ways. I already sacrificed enough of myself, my identity, my heart, and my soul to other men to notgo for what I want and deserve. I’ve given up too much to be afraid of what I want. I deserve love and to be loved.
I deserve it so much that I am willing to fight for it, even my own self.
He backs away completely, and after a few seconds, I get up from the desk, rearrange my clothes and start toward the door.
“I’ll finish working the day, but that will be it,” I say with my back facing him. I can’t bear to look at his face right now, or else I just might agree to be his toy, and I simply can’t do that to myself.
I’ve just built myself back up.
Landon doesn’t respond to me, and I walk out.
The day passes in a blur. It’s busy as usual, and a sense of dread is pooling in the pit of my stomach.
I don’t want to quit.
I don’t want to leave Landon.
But I have to. I must.
This wasn’t healthy from the get-go, and we should have never allowed it to get this far.
The rest of the day, Landon doesn’t emerge from his office nor allow anyone in. He canceled all his meetings and appointments for the second day in a row. I order him lunch and dinner as usual, slip inside to put the food on his desk without looking at him, and leave again.
I don’t feel his eyes on me either. It’s like this shameless demon I’ve known for the whole month suddenly morphed into a brand-new person. Someone silent and pensive.
Someone terrified.
Did I scare him with those words that much?
Would it be so bad to be mine?
I guess so.
When the clock hits eight PM, I am done with all my daily duties since he didn’t have any meetings and try to drag my last minutes here with mundane tasks.
I don’t want to leave yet. Because that will be it. So, I pretend to work on his calendar and future meetings for the better part of the next hour, and by nine PM, I know there’s nothing left to do.
Song: Hey Violet – Guys My Age
The office is eerie, with most of the staff gone for the day.
Collecting and dumping my things in a box, I get up to make my way to the elevator when at the last second, I decide to see him one last time.
I knock on his door. Something I’ve never done before, and his rough voice behind that door bellow me to come in. I take a deep breath and push it open.
Landon raises his gaze to meet mine and sees the little box I’m cradling with my items. His jaw clenches once again, and his muscles strain against that white dress shirt of his.
Yep, he ditched the jacked and made my leaving a hundred times harder.
“I just wanted to say bye. So, have a good night, and despite everything, thank you for the opportunity to work with you,” my voice catches on the last part. I mentally beat myself up for this stupid idea of saying goodbyes.
When Landon doesn’t respond, I give him a tiny nod and turn to leave. But before I reach the door, strong hands grab me from the back, lifting me up, bridal style. All of my belongings fall to the ground with a loud thump and a gasp from me.
“Landon, what are you doing?”
