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“No.” Ray shook his head and his blue gaze warmed as he studied her face. “This isn’t on you, Macey. I lost focus. I apologize. It won’t happen again.”
Macey drew in a sharp breath and fought the emotion making her throat feel raw and her eyes sting. She blinked quickly and looked away. She wasn’t a crier. She would not cry. It won’t happen again. Ray wouldn’t let his guard down and flirt with her, grow closer to her, touch her, kiss her, and make her feel comfortable, confident, appreciated, loved.
She should say something. If only she could give him a final kiss before he walked away and her heart ripped out. If she threw her arms around him again and he gently removed her arms and stepped away … she’d fall apart. She didn’t want him to see her cry.
“Do you need me to protect T before the show?” she asked in a mostly level voice. Focus on the job. Not on losing the man of her dreams.
“No. I’ll stay with him. You enjoy your spa time. You earned it.” He flashed his incredible smile at her.
She’d earned her spa time by surprising him and sort-of pinning him to the ground in front of his men. That had felt … insanely incredible. Right now, it felt … insanely awful.
“Where are we meeting for the interview?” she asked.
“We hadn’t talked about it. T and I will figure it out and come get you about ten minutes before nine. Does that work?”
“Perfect.” Nothing was perfect.
She couldn’t focus on his blue eyes any longer and not beg him to admit that he cared deeply for her, beg him to kiss her and love her behind closed doors. Couldn’t they only pretend she loved his twin in public? Ray was too honorable to sneak around, and he would stay in control from here on out. He’d probably soon realize that Macey wasn’t right for him anyway. Saying this general prince was out of her league was a laughable understatement.
She spun away from him, hurried to the edge of the Olympic pool, and did a shallow dive into the water. Liz was an incredible swimmer and had taught her how to be proficient in a few strokes. Macey would swim until she was exhausted and the tears stopped mixing with the pool water. Then she’d get ready for that interview, pray for divine help, and focus on being ‘brave, bold, and beautiful.’ Without Ray’s hand holding hers.
Surfacing for a breath, she was surprised to see Ray hadn’t moved. He was studying her with piercing intensity in those blue eyes she loved.
She had to reach for the side so she wouldn’t sink. Their gazes held, and all the longing she felt for him was reflected in his eyes.
He tilted his chin up, whirled, and strode away. Macey watched until he disappeared. Then she blinked against the tears racing down her face. Ray was shutting her out.
She’d succeeded at the press conference yesterday because of his steady, comforting warmth. How was she going to get through tonight’s interview? How would she get through the rest of her life without him?
Macey was waiting at ten minutes to nine, dressed in a beautiful fitted floral dress, her hair and makeup looking as good as she knew how to make it look, and praying desperately for help. She had to pretend to be in love with Tristan. Was it wrong to pretend he was Ray in her mind? That was the best idea she’d come up with at this point.
She was a professional. This was just a job. Heaven above would strengthen her and give her the right words and help her not to let her gaze stray to Ray.
A knock came at the door, and all her pretty speeches seemed trite.
Please help, was all she could get out.
“Brave, bold, and beautiful,” she muttered as she walked to the door.
Pulling it open, she knew this was her first test. She almost faltered when her gaze met Ray’s. He was devastatingly handsome in a gray suit and blue plaid tie. His eyes were full, full of her, but he quickly looked away when she met his gaze. That actually helped her not to throw herself at him. Prayer helped too.
She forced herself to focus on Tristan and smile radiantly. He was in a navy-blue suit and yellow floral tie. He was probably just as handsome as Ray. They were identical twins, after all.
“Is your cheek swollen?” she asked Tristan.
“You should see the other guy.” He laughed and exchanged a look with Ray. His blue eyes looked more serious and troubled than she’d ever seen them. “Are you ready to wow the media again?”
“Of course. Interviews. Pshaw. Easy for a computer geek from Ohio.” She winked and laughed. Her laugh was unsteady, her voice was unsteady, her hands were unsteady.
“A brave, bold, and beautiful computer genius from Ohio,” Ray corrected her.
Her hands stopped trembling as she met his gaze. Even if he couldn’t hold her hand, Ray could steady her. “Thank you.”
His gaze was still tortured, but knowing that he cared meant the world to her. The fact that he was so honorable and wouldn’t act on his yearning for her made her fall even harder for him.
“Let’s do this,” Tristan said, offering his arm. She tucked her hand in the crook of his elbow and the three of them walked down the hall, Ray on Tristan’s other side. That was probably for the best, but she liked him close. She prayed harder.
“We thought we’d wow them with the library,” Tristan said. “Take their minds off some of their intrusive questions with an incredible setting. Hopefully.”
