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After a small salute, he waved them through, and James followed the road he could probably drive with his eyes shut. The road she’d ridden with him and Steph too many times to count. And every time she wondered if that would be the weekend James would see her as more than his sister’s best friend. He never had. But this time ...
Uncertainty tugged at her, and she clamped down on her emotions to focus on the home that had just come into sight. “So many memories here,” she whispered.
“I know.”
She shot him a sideways glance. “Don’t worry. I’ll be right beside you.”
He parked but made no move to get out of the vehicle, so she waited, watching him. “The truth is, Lainie,” he said, “I’m angry with him for the way he’s treated me. It’s been petty and selfish, and I never thought my father was either. I mean, we had our moments when I was growing up where we disagreed and argued, but he never acted like he has the past few years. Granted, joining the Army was done to spite him, but if I hadn’t loved the life and my job, I wouldn’t have stayed as long as I did. I tried explaining that to him one day on the phone, and he listened for about five minutes, then hung up on me.”
She winced. “Whydidyou leave the Army?”
He palmed his eyes and sighed. “The official reason is the injury I sustained when our MRAP rolled over an IED. Three buddies were killed. Two of us—me and a journalist—survived.”
She gasped. “Steph didn’t tell me.”
“Steph didn’t know. I didn’t tell anyone.”
“James!”
“I know. If I had it to do over again, I’d probably make different choices, but it was the decision I felt was right at the time and that’s that. I recuperated at the base hospital and went back to work eight weeks later, but ... it was just different. Being in that environment, it was hard. Very hard.”
“I’m sure. The injury you’re talking about ... your back?”
He nodded. “It’s hard to admit, but I got out of the Army more for my mental health than physical. They put the physical reason on my discharge papers.”
“Oh.”
“I’d been talking to a psychiatrist on base, and he recommended I take an extended leave. The PTSD had gotten to the point that I couldn’t focus, couldn’t really do my job, so I took his advice and came home. I took four weeks off to do nothing but try to decide what I wanted to do with the rest of my life.”
“Four weeks? That doesn’t seem very long.”
“It was about three weeks too long for me. I was climbing the walls. The only thing that kept me sane was Cole telling me about the cases he was working and letting me brainstorm with him on how to work them. After I was discharged, he encouraged me to apply with the department. I did and got hired. Over the past couple of months, things were getting better. I was even sleeping better until that whole thing in the hospital. I hadn’t done that in a long time. I’d dreamed, yeah, but not ...that.”
“I’m sorry.” She frowned. “So you came home and took a job with the police department? How is that different from what you were doing in the Army?”
He smiled. “It’s a lot different. I know it seems weird. I think just the whole change of scenery with different people and the counseling, learning coping skills, made a difference.” He sighed. “Like I said, I still dream, but I don’t do what I did in the hospital. Not since coming home, anyway.”
“Getting shot probably triggered it.”
“No doubt. I wondered if it would.”
“Which is why you didn’t want to stay at the hospital. Obviously.”
“Yeah.”
“I wish you’d told me.”
“I wasn’t ready to do that.”
But he was now. Interesting.
A knock on the window made Lainie jump. She placed a handover her racing heart and looked up into Dixon’s brown eyes. The same color eyes as James’.
“Lainie?” Dixon held the reins of a horse. The beautiful black-and-white paint shuffled closer.
Lainie opened the door. “Hi, Dix.”
His gaze moved past her and settled on his brother. His eyes widened. “James? James! What in the ... what are you doing here?”
